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“You're a great guy, Andy. What she did has nothing to do with you.”
“I get what you’re saying, but what you don't realize is that we completely lost focus on each other. I don't remember the last time we were together alone or made time for one another. We just fell apart, never took the time to be together anymore. Everything was all about the boys or the house or what we needed to do with our jobs.
“We just completely lost focus with each other and dammit all, I know I'm the one who forgot to treat her like she was still my wife, as if she was still my girlfriend. We forgot how to date each other and how to be there for one another. We forgot how to be just us.
“I don't know, Tess. I don't know if our marriage could've been saved or not, but all I know is that somewhere along the line we forgot why we fell in love with each other in the first place. We forgot that we were a couple before we were parents. We forgot that we were a couple before we had all this other stuff that goes along with getting older and growing up. I don't know if we could've made anything different, or if there is anything that could have changed to salvage our marriage.”
“Andy—”
I hear Tess’s voice break through. She’s crying.Crying.My heart breaks a little more than it had been already.
“—I’m so scared.”
“Tess, there’s nothing to be scared about. What’s done is done. I hate that it happened but…”
“No, you don’t understand. I’m sad for you, but I can tell you’re pulling through. But, what you’re saying right now. It’s what’s happening to Barrett and me.”
My heart stops. Then starts beating so loudly that I can hear it pounding in my ears.
“Tess… no.”
“It is. I don’t remember the last time that we went on a date, cuddled on the couch together to watch a movie after the kids went to bed, had a conversation about anything but the kids or our jobs. He used to plan things for us, surprise me for lunch, or bring me a coffee. I feel like I’m just a partner now. I don’t feel like his wife. I used to walk in a room, and his eyes would light up. Now we hardly acknowledge one another. I don’t even remember the last time that Barrett kissed me just to kiss me… unless he thinks it will lead to sex…”
Her voice trails off as I take a few staggering steps back, taking in everything that I’ve just heard. None of this is shocking, I just had this same conversation with my own son. But hearing it from her mouth has a much stronger effect on me.
I stand in the doorway, listening to Andy talk to my wife. Listening to Tess’s response. I feel like I am on the outside looking in, and someone is explaining what is happening in our marriage. My gut clenches at the thought of her feeling less than anything but the love of my life. How did this happen between us? Did I pull away first or did she? Or did it just happen because we both forgot to care? Forgot to put effort into each other and started to take the other for granted?
At that moment I know. I know I have to do something drastic, and if I don't do something to make a change now, our marriage will crumble underneath us before we can even catch up.
I fell in love with Tess when I was seventeen and I still am. Always will be. I forgot to show her that I'm in love her, but that ends now.
I notice that I don’t hear talking anymore. I look into the living room, and what I see makes my blood boil. All thoughts of calm and reason and understanding fly right out the window.
Andy.
My friend.
Has.
His.
Hands.
Around.
My wife.
What. The. Hell?
In the back of my mind I know nothing is happening. But I’m raw and quite honestly sad from everything that I heard her say about how I make her feel.
I storm into the living room and grab Andy by the shoulder with such force that, when I pull him away from Tess, his back hits the wall. Immediately I’m on him, pressing him harder against the wall with my forearm against his chest.
“Barrett, what the hell is wrong with you?!” Tess screams in my ear, tugging me back away from him, but I only move a few steps.
“What’s wrong with me? What’s wrong with you? And you—” I point to Andy. “What in the ever loving hell do you think you’re doing?”
“Barrett, calm down.”
