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The nausea passes, and I’m able to eat, but I’m on autopilot and can’t really focus on a thing until Ilona comes back with a white plastic bag full of pregnancy tests.
I want to scold Silvan that I warned him this could happen and why couldn’t he just put on a damn condom? But my scolding would fall on deaf ears because, inexplicably, I’m the only one at the table even remotely bothered by the idea of having a baby with a man I’ve known for less than a month.
I mean, yes, we’re getting married, but my god, this is fast.
I take the bag of tests to the bathroom as soon as the dessert plates are cleared. I open several packages and read through all the directions. I set up a pregnancy test assembly line on the counter and then I wait for the first one to show results.
I have my cell phone timer set for a different test, so I do a mental count for the first one. At the last second, I grab the stick off the counter and check the little window.
I tell myself there will be one lonely line. There has to be. There’s no way Silvan got me pregnant so quickly. No way.
Only there are two lines.
My eyes widen, and I grab the next test.
Same result.
My cell phone alarm goes off, and I press stop, then I grab the third test and look, but I already know what it’s going to say.
Pregnant.
I feel as if I’ve swallowed my heart. It beats in my throat, and my head starts buzzing.
I jump when Silvan raps on the door. “Sophie?”
I clear my throat and try to get the hollow, terrified feeling out of my stomach, then I open the door.
His attentive gaze is on me, searching. “Well?”
“I’m pregnant,” I say softly.
His reaction is delayed by about a millisecond, but then he grins and grabs me around the waist, pulling me in and holding me tight. “That’s great fucking news.”
Is it?
I’m still a little unsure.
It still feels surreal, but I wrap my arms around his middle and rest my face on his chest. He feels so strong and reliable, so sure in the face of my uncertainty that some of the dread melts out of me.
“You’re really happy?” I murmur.
“Are you kidding me? I get to have a baby with my favorite person. What’s not to be happy about?”
My heart gives and flutters and more of my doubt falls away. “You don’t think it’s way too soon?”
“Nah, I’d say we’re right on schedule.”
I crack a smile and tip my head back to look up at him. “You’re crazy.”
He smirks. “That’s why you love me.”
I open my mouth to argue, but he catches my protest on his lips and makes me forget what I wanted to say. His hand cradles my face, then slides into my hair. He unleashes all the butterflies and cages up all the doubt, and when we head back to his parents hand in hand, I feel a crazy little burst of excitement.
We’re going to have a baby.
Melanie is overjoyed to find out her baby is having a baby, and Richard assures me I shouldn’t feel bad, that pregnant brides are a Koch family tradition.
I should have known I couldn’t rely on any of them to be sane in this ordeal.
