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I want to protect Hannah, but I also want to be able to read through all of our old messages when I’m missing her and not drunk or brave enough to reach out.
“Dare, she’s my only friend,” I say, tears promptly glistening on the surface of my eyes, just not enough to fall.
“Then I’m sure you wouldn’t want to lose her,” he says simply.
My eyes won’t stop stinging. I know he can see that I’m upset, but he doesn’t care. He’s focused on achievinghisdesired end, not how he’s making me feel. He wants me to delete the message, so that’s what will happen, regardless of how difficult I make it on myself.
I wake my phone back up and the picture pops up on the screen. My heart squeezes, my fingers refusing to do the dirty work of deleting the message. I don’twantto delete it and I shouldn’t have to.
A light bulb goes off. I don’t know if it will work, but it’s worth a try. Maybe he doesn’trealizehe’s being so mean.
“The only other person with access to this photo is you, and you would never hurt me, right? You always want me to smile? This picture makes me smile.”
Dare reaches out and caresses my jaw. “I believe I saidIwanted to make you smile.”
“Then let me keep it,” I whisper.
His gaze cools and that scares me. My instinct is to pull closer to him when he’s being scary, so I do.
“I’ll delete it if you want me to,” I say quickly, pulling his face close so I can kiss his jaw the way he kissed mine before. “I love you. I would never do anything to hurt you. You know that. But the messages are harmless, Dare, and having them to look back at makes me happy. I don’t have anyone here. Only you. And I love you, I’m not saying you’re not enough, but… Don’t you ever look back at old messages from friends and family you miss? Even cards or notes, things like that?”
“No,” he murmurs. “I’m not sentimental about things.”
“But I am,” I say, meeting his gaze and imploring him to understand. “You know we’re different. Why make me do something that hurts me just because it wouldn’t hurt you? That’s not fair.”
Tears stream freely down my face now. His brow furrows as he notices. He catches a tear sliding along my jawline andcrushes it between his thumb and forefinger, rubbing it out of existence as he seems to consider my request.
I don’t feel terribly hopeful that he’ll understand or even try to see this from my perspective, so I’m stunned when he finally says, “All right.”
I blink a few times, my lashes wet with tears. “Really?”
He nods, watching my face. “You can keep the message.”
My whole being feels lighter with relief, but concern follows quickly on its heels. Is there a catch? It seems like there will be a catch.
He doesn’t say anything else about it, though, so maybe there isn’t. Maybe he’s just doing a nice thing for me because he loves me.
Gratitude wells up inside me. A faint echo whispers that I shouldn’t have to feel gratitude over him letting me keep my own messages in my own phone, but I stomp it down beneath my heeled boot, shove off my coat and throw it over the corpse of such useless common sense.
Dare watches with interest as I sink to my knees on the floor between his legs. My heart thumps with nerves because I’ve never done this before and I’m not even sure I’ll be any good at it.
Before Dare kidnapped me, I’d never gone down on him, and after he said he would force himself on me in front of Anae… my interest in performing the act dried up. I’m sure he must have noticed, but he has never pressed the issue.
But right now, I want to do something special to thank him since he’s doing something special for me.
“Thank you,” I say softly, reaching for the button of his purple slacks and undoing it. I keep my gaze locked on his as I pull the pants down and then his underwear to free his cock. I grip his hard length in my hand and pump, bringing my face close so I can kiss and lick the sides.
Once there’s enough lubrication, I feel more confident pumping him. His head lolls back against the seat. Boldly, I lick my lips and finally take the smooth, swollen head of his cock into my mouth.
I haven’t the faintest idea what I’m doing or what might feel good to him, so I experiment with my tongue and lips, licking the head of his cock like it’s ice cream, then closing my mouth around it and gently sucking.
Dare threads his fingers through my hair, gripping my skull in one hand and guiding me, making me take him deeper into my mouth.
My heart rate kicks up as he does. I remember that day on the beach when I was on my knees in front of him. I wanted to know what it would be like that day, but I couldn’t do it because of Anae.
But that warm memory is immediately overtaken by a cold flash of him in that awful model house on that bed covered in plastic. Dare with his black leather gloves on, terrifying me and saying he’d take my mouth since he hadn’t had it yet.
If this is going to be the last time…
