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“She withdrew, and everyone got used to her not being part of the crowd. Eventually we stopped asking her, knowing that it’d be a waste because she’d make up some excuse not to go.”
Again wishing more than anything in my life that I’d stayed in touch with her. Our lives could have been so different. So many opportunities missed.
“We all saw what a shit Carson was; when he came around, any outsider could sense he was a douche. I know it’s not your fault, I know that staying together would have probably been even harder than letting go. But the ass, he changed the sweet girl she once was, and I think she’s still trying to filter out all of the memories that now drown out the good. Maybe she just needs to be reminded of how it was with you two.”
“Only now it’s us four,” I correct him and he smiles.
“Exactly.” He seems pleased with my response. “Time to clean out all the doubt and fill it with hope.”
twenty-two
. . .
Zoey
“Momma,” Riley comes running down the hallway as the doorbell rings once again. “It’s Prince Jay,” she squeals so loudly that I cover my ears with my hands. Jumping up and down she grips my leggings and tugs as she starts to walk backward toward the door. “Hurry,” she demands just as Regan steps out of their bedroom, with her giraffe in one hand as she rubs at her eyes.
Instantly I remember the fact we all just climbed out of bed and I must look a mess.
“Momma,” Riley whines once again as I smooth my hair.
“Okay, okay,” I say, knowing I’m not going to be able to get out of this, I move through the house. Toys from last night are still scattered over the living room floor, and an empty wine glass sits on the coffee table. After the girls had gone to bed, Lucy, Emma, and I had a group phone call which triggered the three of us indulging in a bottle of wine each. Cleaning up after that was not top on my list as I barely made it to my own bed.
Before I get the chance to open the door, Riley and Regan are working as a team to unlock the door. The sound of the chain echoes as they pull it open finding resistance. I laugh when they both look back at me with annoyance in their little eyes. So much sass pours from the both of them.
“Let go of the handle,” I tell Riley. Of course she crosses her arms over her chest and arches her little brow. Biting my lip to keep from laughing I push the door shut long enough to unhook the chain and then I step back.
What surprises me more than anything is when Regan rushes forward and hugs Jay’s legs. “Yay!” She hops in place, and he looks up at me as he leans over and rubs her back.
“Morning sweet girl.” The smile on his face sends a warm rush of emotions through me. Riley moves in next and the three of them share an adorable moment in a group hug that both worries me and thrills me at the same time.
“Sorry to show up without calling first,” he offers with a shrug as he stands. Holding up a bag he gives it a shake. “I was at the store and I saw the chocolate chips and remembered how much you used to love chocolate chip pancakes.”
“With a mixture of?—”
“The milk chocolate and the white chocolate,” he says at the same time as I do.
“So I took chance.” Jay shrugs in the cutest way like he’s nervous and unsure, but hopeful. “Figured I’d make the three of you breakfast, then maybe we could have a movie night later after I take you all for a ride.”
“A ride?” When I cross my arms over my chest, I’m reminded that I’m in a tank top, leggings, and no bra.
“Yeah.” He grins and I see his gaze drop, as if he can actually read my thoughts. “Got something to show you.”
Curious, I stare at him, and he chuckles. “Breakfast first, then I’ll show you.”
Riley answers before I can and grabs his free hand pulling him into the house. I notice the way he looks over our space. The house is small and cluttered. Twins means two of everything, and leaves little room left for much of anything else.
As we enter the kitchen, he places the bag on the counter and turns around to find me a few feet away. The girls have already started digging through the cabinets for pans and spatulas.
Jay takes this as his opportunity to lean in and talk low enough that only I can hear. “Are you sure this is okay?”
“Yeah.” I try not to nervously nibble on my lip. It’s a habit I’ve developed over time when I’m unsure of something.
“You don’t seem a hundred percent sure,” Jay slips into my side, his shoulder bumping against mine. “I woke up this morning and my first thought was that I wanted to spend it with the three of you. I’ve been having those thoughts a lot lately, and until today I’ve tucked it away because I don’t want to crowd you.”
“And today?”
He tilts his head looking over at me, offering a familiar mischievous grin. “The pull was entirely too strong to ignore.”
