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“It’s worth the story. An, I’m sure you will find more ways to make an impact as you continue working in his marina.”
I ponder her words, feeling inspired.
“Excuse me for a moment, April,” I say. “I just want to take in the view from the deck. The sea always has a calming effect on me.”
April looks up from her notes, only long enough to nod in my direction. “Of course, Emily,” she says. “Don't let me keep you. We can continue our conversation in a bit.”
So, I make my way to the deck, the breeze ruffling my hair as I lean on the railing, gazing out at the tranquil waters.
I wish I'd packed my sundress or anything more appropriate for an afternoon on a yacht. But I’m here to work, and all Ihave on is the professional attire that I deemed perfect for the interview.
As the sun’s rays beat down on me, I remove the blazer, revealing a spaghetti-strap tank top underneath.
Making my way to the edge of the deck, I wrap an arm around my belly, my gaze fixed on the expansive horizon of the endless sea. The yacht sways ever so slightly with the waves, creating a soothing rhythm that lulls my anxious thoughts.
As I stand there, I recall that quiet, tense moment in my bathroom, alone with nothing but a pregnancy test and my racing thoughts. The weight of secrecy presses down on me, and I remember my eyes tearing up as I anxiously awaited the test result. I can still feel the sensation of my trembling hands, the room's silence broken only by my rapid heartbeat.
Then, the verdict appeared, the lines on the stick forming a stark confirmation of a new life growing within me.
“I’m… pregnant?” I remember the way those words tasted on my lips when I whispered them, my voice trembling.
Fear, uncertainty, and pure isolation washed over me. In devastation, I'd completely shut down, choosing to keep this news locked away, away from family, friends, and the world, until I felt ready. The fear of judgment, the uncertainty of the future, and the question of whether I’ll ever find the baby's father, and even if I did, whether he would want to be involved….
The secret remains buried deep within, and I'm left to grapple with the weight of my hidden truth.
I have to find the baby’s father somehow…
It's a puzzle I desperately want to solve, but the thought of uncovering the truth is...too much to bear.
For now, this burden remains mine to carry, tucked away like a fragile treasure, too precious and too precarious to expose. The decision I must make looms on the horizon, but I'm not ready to face it just yet.
I take a deep breath, shaking off these thoughts weighing me down.
I slowly pull a book from my shoulder bag, hoping that the captivating story ofWuthering Heightswill offer comfort.
Settling into a comfortable lounge chair, I flip through the book. The familiar pages should have been my refuge, but today, my heart is too heavy and my mind too cluttered. I try to read, allowing my eyes to traverse the lines of Brontë's masterpiece, but the words blur together, failing to transport me to their world.
Upset and distracted, I carefully place the book on my lap as the pages flip through in the calm ocean breeze.
Chapter sixteen
Alex
Ifind myself pacing back and forth in my cabin, a deep discomfort settling in the pit of my stomach.
This isn't like me at all, and that's what bothers me the most. The relentless surge of emotions I've been experiencing, particularly those involving Emily, is entirely out of character. I've always been one to keep my feelings in check, my emotions neatly compartmentalized. But now, it's like my carefully constructed emotional walls are crumbling.
What's wrong with me?Why can't I just let this go?
I've always prided myself on my self-control and ability to detach from emotions and focus on what matters…my business, the marina, and even my friends. Yet here I am, pacing like a restless teenager.
I flop down onto my bed and pull the pillow over my head, trying to smother the thoughts that I wish never came. The fabric presses against my temple but does little to clear my mind.
It's not just the attraction I feel towards Emily. It's the fact that I can't seem to stop thinking about her that my thoughtsinvoluntarily drift to her when I should be focused on other matters. This is totally unfamiliar territory, and I don't like it one bit.
She's Chris's sister, for fuck's sake. She is sixteen years younger than me, and all I can think about is how much I enjoyed fucking her on my yacht that night. This is complicated and inappropriate. But every time I see her or hear her name, my heart races.
What's come over me?Am I losing my edge?
