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CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
CASSIA
Everyone stares at me on Monday morning. It’s the first indication that Friday night wasn’t just a bad dream.
I hid out all weekend. I didn’t answer any texts. Didn’t go on social media. Didn’t so much as glance at the house across the street.
Maggie and Sydney are silent as we walk inside the high school. It’s a chilly, gray day that matches my mood perfectly. Maggie peels off to head toward the freshman wing. Sydney stays by my side as we walk down the busy hall.
It’s not until we reach my locker that she speaks. “Did something happen between you and Harrison on Friday night?”
My muscles tense as I put my lunch away. “I thought you were over him. Especially now that you’re with Graham.”
“I am. That’s not why I’m asking.”
“Does it matter?”
“To Holden? Yeah, it does. I’d never seen him more upset than when he got home on Friday night.”
My fingers turn white as I grip a textbook so tightly no blood can circulate. “Sydney…” This isn’t a topic I want to discuss with her. Not under these circumstances.
I considered telling her how I felt about Holden when we were in a good place. I never considered it might come up now, when we’re a broken disaster.
“You’re the two people I love most in the world, Cassia. And you’re both miserable.”
I tense, wondering what the hell Holden told her in order for her to land at that conclusion. “That’s not my fault.”
“I know. I’m not taking sides, I swear. Holden said he messed up. But if there’s a chance you can forgive him—”
“He hasn’taskedme to forgive him.”
Sydney sighs. “I know. He’s an idiot. He’s hurt, though. And angry.”
My fingers start to feel numb. He must have shared a lot. Why? “He has no right to be.”
“Would it have bothered you if you saw him coming downstairs with someone else?”
Yes. “Whoever told you about me and Harrison obviously left out that Grace was all over Holden.”
“Holdenis the one who told me about you and Harrison, Cas.”
“He did?” I’m surprised, and it saturates my voice. Holden doesn’t talk about what bothers him, usually. He holds it in until he lets it out with flying fists or harsh words. Illicit fights at the old basketball courts. Smashed bottles and secrets. “What, uh, what else did he say?”
Sydney shakes her head. “He’s my brother, Cassia. Don’t put me in the middle.”
The problem is, I can’t ask Holden. Iwon’task him. I’ve folded when it comes to him too many times. My pride won’t allow me to ask him for answers when he’s given me no indication he regrets how he handled things between us.
“I can’t believe he said anything to you.”
“Why?”
“He’s just…it’s not…I mean, we’re not…” I fumble for words. “Does it bother you?”
“That you never told me how you felt about him? Not really. I figured it out a while ago.”
I look away. “I would have told you if it became anything serious.”
Sydney laughs. “Cassia. Holden punched a cabinet over whatever he thinks you did with Harrison Baker. It’s serious for him.”
