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I had just failed a test he gave me. It wasn’t like a math test. It was a test to see if I could kill my pet bird, to show that I could go through with getting blood on my hands if I needed to.
Of course I couldn’t, and he spent the next hour scolding me. In the end, he killed my bird; snapped its neck and laid the lifeless body in front of me for me to see.
“What is it?” Allura whispers, peering up at me with her big eyes.
The memory of my bird flashes through my mind, how hollow and empty its eyes looked as it lay on the table in front of me. Then I imagine Al’s eyes like that—empty darkness with no spark inside her.
“It’s nothing.” Even though it nearly kills me, I step away from her.
She blinks at me, but then she hastily shakes her head. “I think you should leave.” She folds her arms around herself and steps away from me.
“You know I can’t,” I tell her, hoping my voice sounds neutral, but I highly doubt it does.
She glares at me. “I hate you so damn much.”
My heart is wilting in my chest and, in a panic, I say probably one of the stupidest things I’ve ever said. “Later. Not here, but later. I promise.”
Her brows furrow, her lips part, but she’s cut off by the door opening. And a small part of me is grateful for that.
What the hell did I just do?
Does she know what I meant?
Her mother walks in with a cold expression. “You and I need to …” She trails off as her gaze lands on me, and then she stiffens. “What’re you doing here?”
I arch a brow at her. “Who exactly are you talking to? Because if it’s me, you might want to fix your tone.” I’m usually the quiet one, except for when it comes to protecting Al.
Justine smashes her lips together and starts fussing with her hair. “I’m sorry. Seeing you in here so early just caught me off guard.”
I resist an eye roll. This woman is such a kiss ass.
She clears her throat. “Allura, you have that appointment to make sure your dress fits, and then we still need to go to the store and pick out something for you to wear underneath it.”
Al’s eyes widen, and then a flush spreads across her cheeks. Her gaze fleeting strays toward me, but she quickly looks away. “I told you I don’t care about that,” she tells her mother.
Justine’s gaze flicks to me then back to her daughter. “The ceremony is the day after tomorrow; we can’t do it any other time.”
Allura gradually curls her fingers inward at her sides. For a moment, I wonder if she’ll punch her mother. If she does, I’ll let it happen.
“Fine,” Allura bites out. Then her gaze strays to me, and even though we haven’t spoken in three years, I can see the silent question in her eyes:are you going?
I’m unsure if that means she wants me to go, but I give a subtle nod anyway, since I’m in charge of keeping an eye on her today.
Her expression is unreadable as she wanders over to her dresser, collects a small backpack, and slips it on. Then she wordlessly walks back to us with her eyes on her mother. “Let’s go, then.” Her voice is curt.
Her mother glares at her then smiles sweetly. “It’s not going to be as bad as you think, Allura.”
I’m unsure if she’s referring to the outing today or the fate ceremony.
Allura grumbles something under her breath then trails after her mother.
I follow her, wishing I could place my hand on the small of her back and comfort her. But I can’t. It makes me feel like my soul is dying. The weirdest part is that I thought it died a long time ago, so at least there’s that.
I sigh at my messed-up thoughts.
Yeah, just another day in the life of a messed-up mobster’s son.
ELEVEN
