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“Anastasia. Come. Have a drink with me,” I grinned, searching her face for any hint as to what she was thinking. On one hand, she looked relieved to see me, but there was another part of her that almost looked a little anxious. I decided that I didn’t like that.
“I think you and I should talk,” I began.
A nervous glint glimmered in her unwavering gaze, but it passed quickly as she nodded.
I put down my glass and pushed myself up off the leather chair. I walked over to the bar and grabbed another glass, pouring her a healthy shot of Stoli vodka, just like I knew she liked. She slid onto one of the green velvet couches, sitting across from me as I joined her and handed her the full glass.
“What did you want to talk about?” she asked, taking a tentative sip of vodka.
I didn’t know how she did it. That shit tasted like gasoline to me.
“I know the situation between our families has changed. You and I both know that there is no need to forge an alliance by marriage since the unprovoked attack by the cartel has united us already,” I stated, my voice simple and calm.
I still wanted to marry her. I still wanted to make her mine, but I wouldn’t force her into marriage when it wasn’t necessary and quite possibly something she didn’t want, no matter how much I wanted her.
I wasn’t that kind of man.
She regarded me with those beautifully striking eyes, her gaze unwavering. “So, what are you saying, Connor?”
I took a step closer, the tension in the room almost palpable. “What I’m asking really, is if you still want to marry me after everything that’s happened today,” I said, my voice low and steady, even though a part of me was splintering on the inside.
Her response was neither an immediate “yes” nor a firm “no,” which should have been a relief, but it simply made my heart race even faster. My palms felt clammy, and I rubbed them against my pants absentmindedly. My audible swallow gave away my nerves, and I prayed that she hadn’t heard it.
Instead, she spoke slowly, her words laced with complex emotions I couldn’t quite get a read on. “I’d really like the chance to get to know you better, Connor. Is that okay?”
My heart sank slightly at the ambiguity of her response, but I pressed on. “Is there someone else? Someone you have feelings for?” I asked, my voice tinged with both curiosity and concern.
Anastasia hesitated, her lips curving into a rueful smile. “It’s complicated, but maybe we could work something out after I have a little bit of time,” she admitted, her honesty a bittersweet revelation.
What if it wasmy brother?
“Is it Caden?” I inquired, my voice softer this time, less combative, but I had to know.
Her gaze dropped for a moment, and then she met my eyes with a sense of vulnerability that only made me want to draw her into my arms and hold her in my lap.
“Yes,” she confessed, her voice barely more than a whisper. “But please, Connor, don’t tell him.”
“Why not? I can help if that’s what you want,” I offered. My heart splintered into pieces as the words fell off my lips, but it was the kind thing to do. I wished I could take them back as soon as I uttered them, but I was a man of my word, and if she needed my help, I would give it to her.
“Truthfully, I don’t know how to move forward. Today has been a lot,” she admitted.
“I understand,” I whispered.
Silence reigned between us, and I wanted to say so much more, but I didn’t know where to begin.
“I’m going to go to bed. It’s been a long day,” she announced quietly, and I nodded. “I still like you very much, Connor. I just don’t know what to do about this thing between me and Caden and this thing between you and me,” she admitted.
“You can have all the time you need to figure it out. Sleep well, sweet girl,” I smiled, but the words were painful to speak out loud. I wanted to wrap my arms around her waist and draw that pretty mouth into a kiss, but I did none of those things.
Instead, I just let her go, and I hated myself for it.
As the weight of our conversation hung heavy in the air, Anastasia and I locked eyes once more. A faint blush tinged her cheeks, a subtle yet telling sign of the emotions swirling within her, likely just as tumultuous as mine. She smiled softly in return and nodded once, her expression appreciative.
“Goodnight, Connor,” she replied, her gaze softening. For a moment, it looked like she wanted to reach out and touch me, but something stopped her. Her eyes searched mine, looking for answers, and I yearned to give them to her.
As much as I wanted her to, she didn’t say anything further.
Instead, she turned on her heel and walked out the door. The room was left in silence, and I couldn’t help but watch her retreating figure until she vanished from sight, leaving me with a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions that would linger long into the night.
