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I simply smile in return and walk after Jaron.
When I reach our section in the library, between poetry and self-help, I don’t see him anywhere.
Then, before I even realize what’s happening, Jaron rushes up to me. In one swift move, one hand is wrapped around my waist, and the other is in my hair, and he’s kissing me. In all the romance books I’ve read, they always describe the woman’sfoot popping, or her toes curling when the man kisses her. But I don’t even feel my legs. My whole body tingles with excited anticipation. His warm lips press against mine and I don’t ever want it to end. He presses me up against the bookcase behind me. Both hands are on my waist now, pulling me closer. Warm shivers dance up my spine. I think I may have forgotten my name. Where am I again? When he finally pulls away, we’re both breathless. I’m sure my face is flushed. He caresses my cheek and kisses me once more. Ever so lightly.
I put my hand against his chest and push him back, ever so slightly.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers. “I’ve been wanting to do that for a very long time.”
“I’m glad you finally did,” I say, smiling. “But we need to talk.” I’m not even going to think about how complicated this makes things with Austin and Ethan. I’m just going to push that to the back of my mind right now.
“I’m sorry,” I say. “For the things I said in the video. And for the video being leaked. And for all of it.”
Jaron nods solemnly.
“But,” I say. I can feel my stomach churning. I know I need to be honest with Jaron, but what if my honesty makes me lose him forever?
“But?” Jaron asks. He takes a step back.
“I really didn’t like feeling manipulated into making a decision.”
I reach out for Jaron’s hand. “I like you a lot,” I say. “I need to be allowed to figure out what’s best for me, on my own.”
Jaron sighs. “I didn’t mean to manipulate you,” he says, quietly. “I just really don’t like putting on a show and competing with Ethan on some lame poll.”
“I know,” I say. “I don’t like it either. I just want to be us, with no audience. But since Taylor threw me into the spotlight, I feel like we have to play the game.”
Jaron grunts and pulls away a little. I fear I’m about to lose him all over again. I step closer and kiss him softly. “Please?” I ask. “Please just hang on with me until prom. I really do want the chance to explore things with you, and see what could happen.”
Jaron nods. He hasn’t left yet. So I take a deep breath and finish.
“Are you willing to join the dating game again?” I ask.
“Yes,” Jaron whispers.
“It means more pictures and videos on social media,” I say. “I’m still trying to salvage my reputation. It’s weird how invested people are with who my date for prom will be.”
“I don’t like sharing you,” Jaron says. “But it’s just until prom, right?”
I nod. “Just until prom.”
He sighs. “And then you’ll choose me?” he smiles playfully and winks.
“That depends,” I say. “What do you have planned?”
“Don’t worry,” he whispers, leaning down again. His warm breath tickles my neck and sends chills down my spine. “It’s a surprise. But it will sweep you off your feet.”
“I can’t wait.”
Chapter Twenty-One
I wipe my sweaty palms on my pants and look up into the mirror again. I quirk my mouth and stare at my reflection. I’m wearing the outfit Mom helped me pick out, but I’m still unsure. Ethan will be here any minute for our date. I need to make a final decision now. I decide to trust Mom’s opinion over my own as I strap on the booties that she laid out to go with the dark purple leggings and black swooping top. After all, she’s been team Ethan since day one. She definitely wouldn’t lead me astray.
I’m almost eighteen. I should know how to dress myself by now. I would have probably picked out jeans and a T-shirt though, so what do I know? I guess I should have partaken of all those years Mom tried to feed me fashion advice.
I hurry into Mom’s bathroom and plop myself in front of her vanity. “Make me look good,” I say.
She pulls out her makeup box and lays everything out on the bathroom counter. “Do you want me to teach you how to do it?” she asks.
