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“You know, Brissy, if you want something or someone, you got to make it known,” Sutton remarks, getting my attention with that statement.
“What are you talking about?”
I know I hadn’t said anything to anyone about anything that involved Beast.
“Come on, we’re not dense. We know you have a thing for Beast. You and he were tight before that day that we shall not speak of,” she states, cocking a brow. “That doesn’t mean we can’t talk about Beast. You want him.”
“He left,” I whisper, crossing my arms, rubbing my hands up and down my upper arms, trying to get rid of the chill there.
“But he’ll be back. When he gets back, all you got to do is hold on and let him know what you want,” Ivy says, glancing down to Paxton, who’d run into the room screeching for his mom. His twin sister running behind him with a toy hammer in her hand.
The two of them are hilarious together. They might be toddlers, but Paxton is protective of Sage, even if she’s constantly trying to hit him. I love it when Reaper and Ivy let me watch the two kids. In the time I’ve been staying here, I’ve become Auntie Brissy to them.
“Sage, stop trying to hit Paxton with your hammer,” Ivy mutters sternly, hands planted on her hips.
“But, Mommy, he broke enwine,” Sage complains, face getting red as she tells on her brother about him messing up the toy engine she loves to play with.
“Paxton,” Reaper calls his son’s name as he comes into the room. “I told you about that shit. You don’t break your sister’s toys.”
“She brokes my wegos first,” Paxton yells, pointing a finger at his twin.
“Fuckin’ hell,” Reaper grumbles.
“Reaper,” Ivy snaps. “Language.”
Sutton and I both snicker because we both know no matter what, Reaper wasn’t going to check his mouth around the kids. He says the same thing every time. They know not to repeat the words that come out of his mouth. It’s hilarious to watch. That is until he ends up carting Ivy somewhere private.
“I’ll just leave you guys alone to hash it out,” I state, taking both kids’ hands as Sutton follows behind. Thanks to these two kids the conversation was changed from Beast, and I didn’t have to hear Ivy say more about it. Hopefully, she won’t bring it up again.
“I should probably be getting home too.” Sutton sighs. “I think Tombstone and Bash have had enough daddy-son time to watch football.”
“You know you love giving that to them.” I smile, happy she has that to go home to.
“Yes, I do, but I also like to be with them to watch the game,” she says, grinning brightly. “Anyway, before I go, just think on something for me until Beast gets back. He’s the one you want. Always has been, and if you want to keep him, you need to hold on and show him just that. That you’re willing to hold on. You’ve been through hell with what happened. But remember one other thing while you think on this, Beast didn’t get his name for nothing. None of them do. Something made him into who he is. See if you can convince him you want him to hold on just as tight as you want to hold him.”
Sutton doesn’t give me a chance to respond to her words as they sink in. Instead, I watch her leave the room, those words taking root. I want to think about it, but right now, I can’t. Honestly, there’s no point dwelling on it at the moment. Not when he’s gone, and I’m here. Maybe when he comes back, it’s not like I’ll be going anywhere anytime soon. I’ll use the time to finish healing. Hopefully, the two of us can get back to at least being friends like we were.
CHAPTER 1
BEAST
Present Day . . .
There’s nothing better than pulling up to the clubhouse after months of being away. Going out on the road was good for me to clear my head. I was also able to use the time to look in locations where the Scarlet Needles could be found. From everything that I’ve learned and relayed to my brothers, the organization isn’t far from home. Those who are involved are just keeping themselves shielded away to keep us from finding them. But we’re close to doing just that. I know it deep in my gut we’ll get them. We just have to keep at it until we draw them out.
The club’s not about to let them get away with putting contracts out on the women. From what I’ve heard thus far, nothing’s happened while I’ve been gone, and now that I’m back, I can hope that it stays that way.
I park my bike, slide the kickstand down, swing my leg over and get to my feet. I reach up and take my helmet off, happy not to have to wear it anymore. At least not until I leave the stateagain. Stepping to the back of my bike, I pull my pack out, throw it over my shoulder, and head for the doors of the clubhouse.
I’m ready to get something to eat, a beer, and find one of the PPs to fuck. Then, I’ll find out what else I’ve missed while out on the road.
What I don’t do and have been pushing to the back of my mind is think of a certain woman who, before I left, haunted me. If I’m honest, she still does, but I just shut the thoughts down as soon as they start up. The last thing I need is to bring up the thought of a woman that isn’t for me.
We’d been friends before. I’d set that line because she worked at Keeper’s Pub, and the club’s got a rule. We don’t fuck with employees, it’s bad for business. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t want her. I ended up fucking any woman who slightly resembled Bristol just to keep from giving in to my need for her. That was all before she’d been raped and nearly killed.
Bristol was lucky we found her when we did. Seeing her in the dirt, covered in the blood and semen of another man, it’s a sight I’ll never get out of my head. To make it worse, she refused to see me at the hospital after we saved her. If Reaper and Ivy didn’t demand she all but move in with them, she would have refused help from anyone.
I know the way I handled the situation is probably pathetic, but she made it clear when she wanted me to leave her room that day. Other than the day I saw her before leaving the clubhouse for the past several months, I haven’t even heard a word about her, which has helped me overcome my anger and self-pity.
