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“We need to let them figure this out,” I vaguely hear Rodberg murmur as my energy wanes, and my pounding slows to a few mellow strikes. Cain winces and brings his hands up, grabbing at my wrists, and effectively stops me as I collapse into his chest, crying. Fat tears stream down my face as the emotions of the past three weeks and last night all come out in one fell swoop.
“It’s okay, baby, let it out. Just let it all out,” he urges, holding me to him tightly, his strong arms gripping around me as I fall into him completely. His warmth encases me in a safe haven I so desperately need.
Joey and Rodberg slowly back away into his bedroom, leaving me with Cain, who bends down, lifts me, and cradles me to his chest as he walks with me into his room while I continue to sob against his chest.
He takes us over to his bed and lays me down, moving in beside me, looking me in the eyes, then cups my cheek. “I’m so sorry, Makaylie. I know finding out like that must have broken something inside you. I should have told you I knew him. I was trying to avoid this. I didn’t want to upset you. Please know I was trying to protect you from the horrors of the world. I only want what’s best for you, and if I thought any good would come from it, I would have told you… I swear.” His hand gently caresses my cheek, and my sobs slow to a gentle, soft cry.
“He tried to rape me because ofyou?”I ask straight out.
He lets out a muffled groan with a small nod. “Yes.”
“Will he try again?”
He shakes his head. “Definitely not.”
I want to ask how he knows, but I fear the answer. After the sound I think I heard last night and the way he talks to Trap, I’m not one hundred percent convinced that when I think Cain is a good guy, and he says he’s not, that Cain is actually the one who’s right in this equation.
I look into his eyes, taking a deep breath and preparing myself for what I’m about to ask. I’m not sure how this will be received. “Cain, I’m only going to ask this once, but I need to know. I know you will keep me safe from other people, but…” I pause, taking a few calming breaths, “… am I safe from… you?”
He clenches his eyes shut as a pain-filled look washes over his face. Instantly, I regret asking as his eyes flash open, and replacing his pleading eyes, I see nothing but despair and anguish. Like he’s slowly dying a thousand deaths, and I’m the one digging in the knife and slowly twisting it.
Cain shakes his head as he swallows hard. “Little dove, if there’s one thing in this world you can be certain of, I will neverhurt you. The only thing I want in this life is to protect you from the evil of this world. Being with me…” He pauses, looking away from me as he breathes heavily like he’s having trouble staying focused. So I reach out, touching his cheek, caressing just as he does to me. He looks back at me and sighs. “If I were a good man, a strong man, I would tell you to stay away from me. I would move out of this apartment and make it so you could never find me. And Ishoulddo that. Every part of my head is screaming at metodo that…” His brows knit together to form a single line. “But my heart, Makaylie, my heartcan’twalk away from you. It keeps telling me that if I keep you from my friends and don’t let them know about you, everything will be fine. The only problem with that is around you… I am weak. Last night, I let my defenses down. I showedyouas a weakness, even in a crowded club. And that was to someone who didn’t even know me very well.”
I tense up thinking of Zorko and what he did to me.
Cain notices and pulls me closer to him. “I can’t imagine what you’re feeling right now. Hate me, punch me if you want to, just don’t leave me again. I’m a strong man, Makaylie, but when it comes to you, I’m fucking weaker than an addict looking for his next hit. I’m addicted to you. I can’t have a life without you in it. That’s why I can’t for the life of me let you go or move on without you. I should be the man I’m supposed to be and let you live your life, but I’m fucking pathetic. Ineedyou.”
Sniffling, I lick my lips from the dryness that overtakes them. A shiver runs over my body, and he holds me tighter as I try to digest all this information. He’s hinting that there’s more to him, a darker side, but I’m not willing to go there tonight. I’m too emotionally spent, and finding out about Zorko is enough emotion for me to take in.
“I’m not going to leave you. You’re stuck with me because as much as you say there’s a reason you shouldn’t be with me, I think there’s every reason you should. I don’t know what you’re holding back. But I know you well enough to know that there must be a good reason. One day, I’m going to want to know, Cain.” He tenses in my arms, and I shake my head. “Not today, probably not for a little while until I can wrap my head around the information I already have. But Cain, if I’m going to be in your life, I need to actually be in it. Let me in. Trust me enough to tell me what’s happening in this dark side of your life. I might not run like you think I will.”
He weakly smiles and rests his forehead against mine. “How do you know part of my life is dark?”
I let out a small laugh. “Cain, you’re domineering, you’re rich as fuck, and you’re in couriers, shipments, debt collecting, but making the calls and working during stupid hours of the night. Doesn’t leave much to the imagination, does it?”
He shakes his head. “The company is a twenty-four-seven business that ships all over the world. So we deal with time zones… hence, stupid o’clock.”
I nod, letting out a bemused laugh. “Okay. Just know that if it were something of the more… sinister variety, as long as you weren’t doing anything massively illegal that could, say… land you in jail, I think I’d be okay with it. In fact, I might find it kind of hot.”
He raises an eyebrow and smiles crookedly. “Well, look at you. It’s always the quiet ones you have to look out for. Makaylie Rayne wants herself a bad boy.”
“No, notabad boy,thisbad boy,” I reply while running my hands up under his shirt, resting my head on his chest.
He chuckles and wraps his arms around me, pulling the blankets over us. “I swear, I’m going to do everything in my power to take care of you. Nothing is going to hurt you, not while I’m around.”
“I know. I know you’ll always protect me. And if anything does happen, you’ll save me.”
He sighs and leans in, kissing my head. “I shouldn’t need to save you, Makaylie. It’s only because you’re with me you’ll need saving.”
I chew on my bottom lip, thinking that even though I know he will do everything he can to protect me, I think Zorko won’t be the last encounter I have.
And that thought sends a shiver down my spine, making me tremble in fear.
CHAPTER TWELVE
CAIN
Two Days Later
