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I hated that it was half a lie, because I knew exactly what was happening, but I was just… I was terrified of it.
Dusk finally halted. The sensation was something akin to being shoved to the edge of a cliff, and then wrenched back.
I let out a pitiful sob, not sure if I was relieved or furious, but then he gripped my chin, dragging me to face him.
“What did you say?” he asked, blinking down at me with those piercing yellow eyes.
“I…” I trailed off, years of shame collapsing in over my head. My voice wasn’t working right. “I haven’t… I don’t…”
“You’ve never had an orgasm?” It was the first time I’d seen him stunned.
I opened my mouth to reply, then shut it.
Never.
Not that I could remember, anyway—and by the way I’d panicked, I don’t think before I’d lost my memories, either.
But he didn’t understand. It wasn’t like I’d been able to go on dates.
Too risky.
Always too risky.
And I’d been soscared of being more of an imposition than I’d already been at the Aster Estate. They hadn’t wanted me from the start, but they couldn’t get rid of me.
My hormones hadn’t been such a problem until I’d come here and been surrounded by alphas.
“Oh, Shatter…” Dusk breathed. “You get sweeter and sweeter, don’t you?”
He pressed his fingers between my lips, the same fingers he’d been dipping into me. I jerked back, but his grip laced into my hair.
“I’m going to be your first…everything, then?” he asked, delight dancing in his eyes.
Nerves collided with frightening anticipation at those words.
My firsts were for my mates—something I truly had to offer.
But I could see in his eyes that I might not be getting to the Lincoln pack before Dusk stole those too.
No… I couldn’t let him take more.
“The sweeter you are,” he breathed in my ear. “The more there is for me to ruin.”
EIGHT
DUSK
On the way back to the apartment, I received an email telling me the Dean needed an urgent meeting.
My delightful little omega was going to have to wait.
“No couch. Tonight it’s me, Umbra, or the nest—if you accept it,” I told her as we got back. She shot me a filthy glare. I dragged her suitcase from the bathroom, and she chose to sit beside it on the couch, huddling next to it anxiously as if it was the only source of comfort.
She was being stubborn.
She would take my nest.
Shatter was ours, and my heart sung every time I caught a glimpse of our crest around her neck. Besides, I’d seen her sneak my scone into her bag this morning.
