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I squeeze her wrist tighter, pulling her hand toward me. “Obsessed,” I say, pulling her fingers straight and sucking them between my lips. She lets out a gasp as her fingers slide out of my mouth with a pop. “I love the way you taste.”
Her face flushes, and fuck she looks good when I’m the reason she’s red. I think this is the perfect place to leave it. “I’ll see you Friday.”
“Friday?” she asks with a whisper still looking down at the fingers that were just in my mouth.
“At Declan’s,” I say with a wink as I step out of her car. “Drive safe, Thea Marie.”
Chapter 24
Thea
“Oh, wait!” Addy says with wide eyes. “What time did we put the cupcakes in?”
I glance at the oven before looking back at her. “Shit! I don’t know.”
We both burst into laughter as we check if they are done yet. Neither one of us is the best at baking, but we’re trying our best here. “Maybe we should have stuck with only making cookies,” she jokes as we attempt to salvage what we can of the cupcakes.
“Cake pops, maybe?” I ask with a giggle.
My smile drops when the front door opens and Mack and Trevor walk in. I got here early to get started, and I haven’t been looking forward to him arriving. Well, that’s not entirely true. I have been looking forward to it. I’ve been dreading looking forward to it. I’m not happy that I’m happy.
The boys are really only going to help wrap the baked goods up and get them loaded into the car. Mack and Declan’s little cousin, Lily, is having a baked good sale for her school’s soccer team. The proceeds allow every player to be able to go to soccer camp this year regardless if they can pay for it or not. That hit close to home for me. There were so many activities I didn’t sign up for because I didn’t want to upset my dad by asking formoney, so if I have to spend half a day baking with my friends, then that’s a small price to pay.
“Smells delicious,” Mack says, smiling like everything is normal even though my whole body is on edge in his presence.
“Oh, let me grab the boxes from the garage, and you boys can start loading up the car,” Addy says, putting the boys to work as soon as they arrive.
“I’ll help,” Trevor says, following her out and leaving me alone with Mack.
“Hey,” he whispers, his demeanor changing to something more intimate.
“Hi,” I respond, turning away to grab the cookie sheet off the stove, but more importantly, to not have to face him.
I start scooping the cookies onto the plate when Mack walks up beside me. He’s close enough that I can smell his aftershave. I open my mouth, trying to think of something to say when he grabs a cookie from the tray and takes a huge bite.
I swat at his hand. “Mack! Those are for the children!”
His mouth tips up on the right side. “I can be your child,” he says with a mouthful of chocolate chips.
“Don’t,” I threaten.
He runs his tongue along his top teeth with a mischievous smile. “Yes, mommy.”
“Get the fuck out of my kitchen!” I say, unable to hold in my laugh as I mix the final batch of cookie dough.
Mack opens his mouth to say something, but the garage door opens back up. His eyes flick that way before he steps further away from me without saying anything. My eyes drop to the mixing bowl. I try to keep my face neutral, but my jaw tenses as shame washes over me and that familiar voice in my head tells me I’ll never be good enough to be loved.
I stretch my neck from side to side, trying to shake it off. It’s not something I can show the world. It’s embarrassing tohave low self esteem. I know that. I know you’re supposed to love yourself. I know you’re not supposed to determine your value from others. I know it all. But how am I supposed to find things to love about myself when no one else has been able to?
Fuck him.
I was having such a fun time with Addy. He’s here for a couple minutes, and now I’m shitting on myself? Fuck him.
Declan makes an appearance now that he isn’t outnumbered by the girls. Addy directs them on how she wants everything loaded up while we finish up the last batch of cookies. Declan wraps his arms around Addy’s waist, kissing her cheek. “Yes, princess,” he says before heading out with the rest of the guys.
I can’t help but be jealous of their relationship. Declan never misses a chance to show other people he’s with Addison. All I’ve ever wanted was to have someone fight to be with me the way he did with her. Instead, here I am again, hopelessly in love with someone who can’t even be seen with me.
I try not to let my thoughts bring down my mood, but I know Mack feels the shift in energy towards him. I’ve avoided looking his way, and I don’t engage in conversation when he’s speaking. Of course, he can’t let it happen. He has to come over next to me.
