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I felt like I had just been steamrolled all over again. “I don’t know about you, but I could use some actual food now. Something apart from liquefied grapes to wash out this terrible taste in my mouth.” My eyes suddenly filled with tears and overflowed. The girls all scooted in and embraced me.
“Let it out,” Jenny whispered as she rubbed my back.
“It’s gonna be fine,” Lauren said, joining her. “We’ll figure it out.”
“Yeah. We’ll get your money back. We’ll figure something out,” Jenny soothed.
“Even if we have to hogtie him and take him to the bank,” Audrey threatened.
I laughed, wiping my eyes. “Thanks. I needed a good laugh.”
“Who said I was joking?” Audrey countered, hand on hip.
“I got rope and duct tape,” Jenny offered.
“Of course, you do,” I said. “I’m not sure if it’s for your other job or just ’cause you’re kinky as fuck.”
She stuck out her tongue. “Maybe it’s both.”
“I’ve got a truck,” Lauren proposed.
“And I’ve got—” Audrey thought a second. “Well, I don’t know what I got. What do I got?” she asked, looking at each of us one at a time. “What else do we need?”
We busted up laughing.
“Well, regardless, I’m in,” Audrey began again. “I’ll do whatever I can to nail that bastard, and his balls, to the wall!”
“We all will,” Jenny said.
“Yeah,” Lauren agreed.
“Seriously, you guys are the best.” I hugged them all again. “All right, enough of this. Let’s eat. I’m starving.”
* * *
Lauren smacked her lips together.“Can I just say,bestfucking garlic bread.Ever!” She leaned over and tore off another huge piece and shoved it into her mouth.
“And I have the crème de la crème of desserts!” Jenny added.
Five minutes later, Lauren, Audrey, and I sat on the couch, music playing in the background. Jenny rolled in a dessert cart, on top of which sat one of the best cheesecakes in the world. Audrey and Lauren clapped their hands like two elementary schoolgirls. “Compliments of Sophia—aka best adopted grandma ever.”
“When’d you sneak that in behind my back?” I asked.
Jenny winked. “I might have bribed her the other day.”
Lauren grabbed the large carafe of coffee and poured us each a mug.
“Quite a setup,” Audrey said, eyeing everything. “So glamorous, dahling,” she drawled, using her best hoity-toity impersonation, touching her imaginary pearl necklace.
“Anything for my best bitches,” Jenny answered in a crass county hick accent as she cut into the cake. “And to top it off”—she held a glass bowl up in display—“raspberry purée.”
“This is pure sin.” Audrey handed her plate over to be topped off.
“And pure delight,” Lauren concurred.
“Speaking of sin and delight. Fill us in on Mr.—what’d you call him?” Audrey asked.
Jenny laughed, a mouthful of cheesecake temporarily prohibiting her from speaking. “Mr. Fuck-Me-Hard,” she finally said with a laugh. All three of them began gyrating in fake throes of passion.
