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Tess wasn’t afraid of Patrick because she’d walked out on him. That he might be the person who’d gone into her mother’s bedroom and taken something of hers? Yeah, that guy was scary.
Deciding to stand up to whatever her mom was running from was going to mean doing things far scarier than meeting a man in a bar. She wasn’t alone. Danny would notice if she dropped off the face of the Earth. If for no other reason than there was no one around to suck his cock, he’d notice.
Pushing her shoulders back and her chest out, Tess strode on, opening the door and going inside. The background music and conversations of others gave some comfort. The bar was the same as always. Turning to check their table, she ignored the part of her that wanted to find it empty.
It wasn’t.
Raising his hand in a static wave, Patrick rose out of his chair to sweep a hand toward their table, showing he’d already got drinks. Forcing herself to smile, Tess went to him. He often bought drinks before she got there. Even when she offered to buy them, he would say he was happy to pay. That night, the paying part was less her concern than the drink being exposed to the air, vulnerable to anything anyone might slip into it.
“Hi,” Patrick said, leaning over to kiss her cheek as she slipped in at her side of the table. “I wasn’t sure you’d come.”
“I wasn’t sure either,” she said, sitting down just before he did.
No matter how she tried to play it in her mind, she couldn’t pick the right course. Confronting him with her suspicion could just scare him back into his hole or force him to take drastic direct action. Strategy wasn’t her strong suit.
And there, in that minute, her stupidity was blinding. Another warm body to fill the void left by her mother wasn’t what she wanted. She wanted someone to care. That was what her mother did. Anne loved her… and that was why she’d run from the Big Bad.
Damnit.
Why hadn’t she seen it sooner? They’d been running her entire life. They were running because of her, because her mother wouldn’t risk the life of her child for any reason.
Patrick reached over to touch her wrist. “Are you okay?”
Taking her arm from beneath his grip, she sat back. “Yes, sorry,” Tess said, still not sure how she’d get to the truth. “It’s been a long week.”
“I was worried about you. You disappeared and then… I didn’t know what to do.”
Because she didn’t have a phone number and had never given him her address. If he was genuine in his identity, her behavior would seem odd. If not, she wasn’t in any rush to give him personal information.
“I know, I just… You know, with my mom and…”
“Sure,” he said, nodding. “You’ve been through a lot recently. Did you find out more about your mom’s letters?”
She shook her head, keeping her focus from his, deciding then that she wouldn’t reveal the truth. “No. I couldn’t face it. I wouldn’t know where to begin and I don’t even know if they’re hers.”
“Yeah, you said that,” he said, sipping his drink. An awkward silence descended. The rest of the bar was happy and busy; their little corner by the window was neither. Patrick cleared his throat. “I guess the place to start is with how they were exchanged.”
That took her gaze to his. “Exchanged?”
“Didn’t you say there were no envelopes or that you couldn’t find them? Do you think whoever he was writing to wrote back?”
The subject was sensitive. Still, as long as he was putting useful ideas in her head, she wouldn’t stop it. Already her mind was working. In what she’d read, there were references to received letters. So, yes, they had been writing to each other back and forth.
“I… I don’t know,” she said, pushing up to sit straighter. Moving her purse in time with the adjustment, she used it to knock over the drink, making it seem accidental. Liquid cascaded across the table; both of them shoved their chairs back to avoid the stream. “Damnit, I’m sorry.”
Apparently Patrick hadn’t been fast enough. “That’s okay,” he said, swiping at his pants. “I should go to the restroom to clean up.”
“Sure,” Tess said, offering him a tight smile.
He started to rise, but paused to look her in the eye. “You will be here when I get back, won’t you?”
“Of course,” she said, widening her smile. With a nod, he got up to head for the men’s room. Tess watched his progress until he was out of sight. “Just don’t expect me to drink anything you put in front of me.”
Leaving the table, Tess went to buy a bottle of wine. That would sustain her and prevent the necessity of skirting drink offers. She’d stay a while, see if she could read any cracks in his persona while they discussed the week. Avoiding talk about herself, she’d see if he tried to divert conversation her way or raised the letters again. If he had an obvious interest, her suspicions about him could be valid.
Coming to meet him had been worth it already. The exchange of the letters had niggled at her. Why hadn’t she focused more on that detail? Now she would. How would two people correspond when at least one of them was moving all the time?
TEN
