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Nova was beyond exhausted. It felt like every cell in her body was dry and burning. She needed to get some sleep, or she was going to keel over.
She staggered into the house and let Mona slide down her body. Mona was really getting too big to carry everywhere, but she’d fallen asleep in the van, and Nova didn’t think today was the day to tell her she was too old to be carried. She dropped her bag on the floor and headed for the kitchen.
Gunner dragged her arm. “Are you hungry? I’ll get you something?”
She was too tired to eat, but she hadn’t fed Bull yet. “Bull ...” she said weakly.
Gunner pulled her closer and wrapped his arms around her. He smelled good. Like laundry detergent and pine. She let herself melt into him and breathed him in. “I told him to fend for himself tonight,” Gunner said softly. She could feel his breath on her hair—and inexplicably, it was this that made tears pop into her eyes for the first time in hours. He relaxed his embrace a little, and she nearly cried out. She didn’t want him to let go of her—ever. He kissed her on the top of the head. “If you’re hungry, I can fix you anything. It won’t be fancy, but ...”
She laughed into his chest. Yeah, like that nearly disintegrated pot roast had been fancy? If she’d called it roast puree, maybe it would have gone over better. “I’m not hungry.”
“Okay, then let’s get these munchkins into bed so you can get some sleep.”
She was too tired to voice her agreement, but she pulled away to grab for Mona, who was heading for the couch. “Come on, honey. Let’s go to the bathroom, and then we’ll go to bed.” She stumbled through the motions of washing faces and brushing teeth, and it felt like it took forever, but eventually she was dragging them up the stairs. She didn’t know where Gunner had gone, but she trusted he hadn’t gone far.
As usual, Mona cried and asked her to sleep with her, and though Nova felt guilty for neglecting Gunner, she was too tired to worry about that tonight, so she climbed into bed with Mona.
But then then Nova couldn’t fall asleep. Despite her exhaustion, her brain stayed in motion. Mona’s breaths quickly stretched out into soft snores, but Nova stayed awake. She heard Gunner’s footsteps on the stairs and longed to be close to him. She heard him go by in the hallway and was sad that he hadn’t checked in on them, but why would he? He wouldn’t want to risk waking either of them up.
Feeling like a tattered version of herself, she slipped out of bed and went to his doorway. She was glad to find it open, but it was dark, and she wished she could see him. “Gunner?” she whispered into the dark.
“Yeah?” he said immediately, sounding concerned. He sat up in bed. She could see his large form, but his face was still lost in shadows.
“I’m really too tired for romance, but would you mind ...” She didn’t know how to phrase what she needed, so she just went to the other side of the bed. “Would you mind just continuing that hug for a while?”
He hesitated, but then he pulled back the covers. “Of course not. Whatever you need.”
She slid into the bed beside him, and it was so warm and so inviting, and it smelled like him. He pulled her into his body and wrapped his thick arm around her back pulling her tighter still.She pressed the side of her face into his chest, and the tears came then, slow and burning. He rubbed her back and said nothing as she cried into his chest.
She had lost her mother. Her whole life had been turned upside down. Every part of her hurt. But this man—this man felt like a miracle, and she was so, so grateful that he was there, that he cared about her, that he was holding her.
And in this weird storm of grief and gratitude, Nova cried herself to sleep.
Chapter 37
Sunlight streamed in through the large windows in Denver’s Albuquerque living room. Denver sat with his eyes closed, making up a story in his head as Emmylou sat in his lap watching a cartoon. When he heard footfall, he opened his eyes to see Jenna with her mouth hanging open. Emmylou slid off Denver’s lap and ran to her mother, but Jenna didn’t even look down.
“What happened?” Denver asked, starting to become alarmed.
“I just got off the phone with Frankie ...”
Denver slid to the edge of his chair. “What happened!”
Jenna held up a hand. “No, no,” she said quickly. “Everyone’s fine, but ...” It seemed she was scared to tell him whatever it was.
“Please spit it out.”
The words flew out of her mouth. “Gunner got married.”
Denver swung his arm back so he could clutch his arm rest for support. His forearm sent his ZIA bottle flying—he could hear it fizzing as it hit the carpet.
“Gunner got married towho?” Even as he said the words, he knew they couldn’t be true. Gunner wouldn’t get married, who would he marry, and he wouldn’t marry without telling him! Before Jenna could answer, he said, “What are you talking about?” He had run straight at the edge of the frenzied cliff and then leapt off it.
Jenna stepped closer, and he could tell that she was annoyed. “How about you take a deep breath?”
He forced himself to lean back in his chair and breathe. There was no way Gunner had gotten married. He’d just talked to him a few weeks ago, and the man hadn’t mentioned any woman other than General Lee. “How about you tell me what is going on before I lose my mind?”
She smiled, and her eyes sparkled. “It seems your brother had fallen madly in love with a woman from church and married her without telling anyone but Ryker.”
