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Gray and I have done so many things there can’t really be any unknowns left. Can there?
My mind is so fucking jumbled I give up on trying to find the source of my fear. Instead, I eye the zip-up hoodie and decide against wearing it. Today, I’ll only wear the tee and yoga pants. And if anyone notices my scars, they’ll know how fucking tough I am.
Those are Mama’s words, but I repeat them daily as a mantra. Just waiting until the day comes where I truly believe them.
After brushing my teeth and gathering my hair into a messy bun on top of my head, I exit the bathroom.
Gray’s already dressed, and his hair is weighed down on his head from the water he’s soaked it in. I know he’ll shower while I train with Mama. Fuck, if it wasn’t for my time with her, I don’t know when he’d find the time to do it since he still refuses to leave me alone. I suppose he could do it while I’m sleeping, but I already know he wouldn’t risk me waking up to find him not there.
Fuck, the lengths he goes to. It’s no wonder I love him.
“What are you smiling at?” he rasps as a goofy smile splits my lips.
Sitting down I put my new trainers on. They were a gift from Mama and Rocco. Attached to the left shoe was a note that read:
KICK ASS
… and to the other…
AND DON’T CARE ABOUT THEIR NAMES!!
The notes were written in two different handwritings, so I imagine they each wrote a note. While I can’t be sure, I think the shorter one was Rocco and the latter from Mama.
“Nothing,” I finally answer once I’ve tied the laces on both shoes. “Are you ready? I’m starving.”
Gray picks up the hoodie I’ve placed next to me on the couch. “Not wearing this today?”
I shake my head and bite the inside of my cheek. “Not today.”
It’s not exactly a smart decision on my part since the clubhouse isn’t the warmest place. But right now the thought of being courageous is enough to keep me warm.
Gray places his hand on the small of my back and gently guides me downstairs. As we get nearer to the main room, I boldly come to a stop.
“Forgot something?” he asks, and I shake my head.
“I want to try something,” I murmur. Then I take his hands and place them on my hips.
Our eyes lock on each other, darkness to light as his almost black orbs zone in on my bright blue ones.
My hands are still on top of his, and I gradually increase the pressure until my heart skips a beat and my palms become clammy.
“Princess,” he rasps, licking his lips. “If you push this much further, you’ll end up making me the bad guy for your impatience.”
I want to point out that I’m not the only one who’s being impatient, only… I’m not sure that’s true. Gray hasn’t once given me reason to think he wouldn’t wait forever. He’s right, it’s totally me that’s eager to get over this stage.
“Just one more minute,” I say, my tone barely above a whisper. Clearing my throat, I try to explain the way I feel. “I don’t want to rush us. But Gray, I’m scared that it’ll never get better if I do nothing. Does that make sense?”
He ponders the words for a couple of minutes—which feels like an eternity in the ensuing silence. “Yeah,” he finally answers.
Stretching to my tiptoes I move my lips until they’re almost touching his. Almost. I hold myself still, loving the way his breath fans across my sensitive skin.
A door slams in the distance, and a chair sounds like it’s being toppled over. As soon as the noises register, I shrink in on myself, no longer feeling strong or adventurous.
“I’ll fucking kill them,” Gray growls as he pulls me to his side.
Without another word he wraps his arm around my middle, pretending not to notice the way I tense as we walk into the main room.
“Zoe!” Rose squeals.
