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Even though it’s dark,I nod.
“I’m so fucking sorry it took me so long to find you.” He pauses and takes a shuddering breath. “Zo, you need to know I’ve looked for you everywhere. I never stopped looking—”
Interrupting him, I say, “I know.”
He doesn’t need to explain himself, or give me excuses for why we’ve been apart for three fucking months.
Though my brain is slow at piecing things together, I feel like I’m getting there. That’s not important. No, the poignant thing is that we’re together again, and that, unlike me, Gray never gave up hope. Where I believed he was dead, he never entertained the idea that I was. So if anyone has a reason to apologize, it’s me.
Without thinking, I lean closer to him. “I read a newspaper article,” I say, urgency coating my words. “It said the Cruz Kings no longer had a VP. I never believed Gunner or Rusty before that article… but…”
“But once you read it, you thought I was dead,” Gray interjects, saying the words I can’t get across my lips.
“Yes,” I squeak, feeling embarrassed I gave up on us so easily. “I’m sorry—”
“No!” Gray almost shouts. “You have nothing to be fucking sorry for, Princess. God, I’m the one who needs to apologize. Now… forever… me, and not you. Fuck, Zo. I lost you, and it was all because of someone I thought was my friend and a woman we let into our club.”
Not able to talk about Gunner, I focus on the Rhiannon part of it all. “She didn’t betray you,” I say, needing him to know this.
“The hell she didn’t,” he says through clenched teeth. “She fucking took you from me.”
I shake my head again. “No, Gray. I went with her willingly. That was my fault. I should have insisted on waiting for Cain, or… I don’t know. Called Alana or something.”
Gray grumbles something that sounds like him agreeing with my fuckup, which is fair.
“But Rhiannon was told the attacks on the club would stop if she handed me over,” I say, determined to tell him the truth. “She didn’t betray the club. Only me.”
He lets out a humorless and wry chuckle. “Only you, Princess? Is that right? What about the fact I’d claimed you and that you’re mine? Or the fact you’re the fucking Mama and she handed you over to the enemy? Or just—”
“Gray, it wasn’t like that—”
Ignoring me, he carries on. “If you don’t want to take any of that into consideration, then there’s the fact she broke the club code of conduct about loyalty. Spin it however you want, Princess. She was a fucking traitor.”
As I open my mouth to reply, I sense movement from the floor. Before I can stop myself, I let out a high-pitched scream and roll off the bed, crouching with my back against the wall.
“Who’s there?” I hiss. I ball my hands into fists, ready to take a swing at whoever just snuck up on us.
“Hey now, it’s just me, girl,” comes Alana’s surprised voice.
Straightening, I let my arms fall to my side. “What the hell are you doing here?” I ask, surprised that Gray let her into our bedroom like this.
I remember talking to her… it must have been yesterday. But beyond that, everything’s blurring together. I’m still so fucking tired that even talking to Gray is draining me.
“You wanted me here,” Alana says, sounding a little hurt. “Don’t you remember begging me not to go?”
As she mentions it, I kinda do recall something like that. I think. It’s so hard to keep things straight, and the dream within a dream didn’t help at all.
“Sorry,” I mutter, feeling bad for upsetting her.
Alana makes a tsking sound. “Fuck off, Zoe. You have nothing to apologize for, and if you want me to leave, I’ll go cuddle with Slasher instead of your floor.”
Do I want to be alone with Gray? Yes… but also no. Fuck, I don’t know what to do here. I know he’d never hurt me, that’s not even a question. So why are my legs shaking and my teeth chattering so badly?
“I-it’s okay,” I stammer, which doesn’t really saymuch.
Taking a deep breath, I try to center myself. When I woke up, I didn’t know Gray and I weren’t alone, and I was fine. So…
“Go find Slasher,” I say, trying to sound like my insides aren’t in knots. “We’ll be fine.”
