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“Does it matter why he’s so set on it?” Boris lifts his mug. “Your objective has always been to destroy Branko because of what he did to your family. Why do you care about Alek’s reasons for wanting him dead?”
I blow on the hot coffee before lifting the mug to my lips and taking a sip. “I want someone to finally be honest with me, I guess. Right now, I feel like I’ve been a pawn for Alek and for my father before him. Nobody’s been honest with me.”
Letting out a groan, I run a hand through my hair and sit back in the chair. “And then I let Quinn walk out the door last night without even trying to stop him. He was the one person who managed to save me from myself, the only one who seemed to care.”
“Why did you let him go?”
“I was stupid, in shock over everything I’d just heard from Alek, floored by what Stepanov told me about Dad…” I shake my head. “He went off the rails completely and I just… I couldn’t even find the words to make him stay. He left because he didn’t want to get in my way again, but he’s the only one who made it a point to get in my way in the first place. I chose to stay here with Alek, who’s sent me into more fucking rabbit holes than I care to count.”
“I wouldn’t have blamed you if you went after him.” Alek’s voice makes me jump.
I twist around in my chair to see him lounging against the doorway to the kitchen. “I should have. He cares more about me than you do.”
“In a very different way, yes.” Alek shudders, walks over to the empty chair across from me, and sinks into it. “But you’re wrong if you think I don’t care about your best interests.”
“How could I believe that you do? Especially knowing that you’ve been putting me in these situations, all because you need protection? How is that showing me any bit of respect?”
“Val, you’re an assassin. You should be a cold, ruthless killer. You take instructions and you carry them out. There’s no room for coddling. If that’s what you need, you’re in the wrong business.”
“You’re a real dick, you know that?”
“So I’ve heard.” Alek’s lips quirk upward. “I know what you need, what you want. And I’ve always tried to give it to you. Sometimes leads run cold. Sometimes plans and targets change. Sometimes new information is brought to light. But it doesn’t mean I disregard you or your safety. I need you to be flexible and not so emotionally involved. A lot of the problems you’ve faced over the past few days have come from getting too attached to things. To Branko’s demise. To saving the world.” He takes a sip of his coffee and smirks. “To your fake husband.”
I cover my face with my hands. “I’m dedicated. Sue me.”
“Maybe you’re so dedicated because there’s something more there that you don’t know how to handle.”
“Oh, you think?” I spew sarcastically. “I’ll assume you’re talking about Quinn. Although I don’t know why you’d care, since you’ve made it clear from day one that cockroaches rate higher than him.”
“He’s a wild one, that’s for sure.” Alek strokes his beard. “But the second you let people know that they’re valuable, you lose control. And judging by what we’ve had to deal with, control was the last thing I wanted to part with.”
“So you used reverse psychology. Jesus, Alek.”
“It worked. I got what I needed out of him. He didn’t cause too many headaches. And now he’s gone.”
“Yeah, Val, how’d you let that happen anyway?” Luka’s intruding voice breaks into the conversation. He and Taras drop into two nearby seats at the table.
“You, too?” I look at them, my mouth agape. “You do remember that all of you were basically telling him to piss off last night, right? And this morning you’ve had a sudden change of conscience?”
Luka picks up a slice of toast and drops it on his plate. “You didn’t fight hard for him at all. I wanted to see how far you’d let it go. I was shocked when you didn’t go after him.”
“I made a choice.” I slap my hands on the table and the coffee in my mug sloshes over the side. “I chose the family. Defeating Branko. Avenging Mom, Dad, and Charly.”
“We’ve all made choices. Doesn’t mean you have to miss out on happiness. Or…” Luka exchanges a look with Alek that makes me gag. “Whatever else you two have been up to.”
“Stop looking at him like that or I’ll barf right here and now.” I stick my finger in Luka’s face.
“You thinkyouwanna barf at that?” Taras mutters, running a hand through his sleep-tousled hair.
“Look, don’t get me wrong, the guy’s a buffoon. But I saw how he looked at you last night. How he was willing to step aside because he knows how much this means to you and he didn’t want you to have to make the hard choice between us and him.”
“He makes me happy, okay? And I want to be happy. Except there’s unfinished business to handle. I didn’t think I could have it all, okay? I’ve always sacrificed. It comes naturally to me now, I guess.” With a roll of my eyes, I sip my coffee.
“If you want him back, you need to go and find him. Tell him you made a mistake.”
I groan. “I was so shattered by what I found out last night. Hearing that I’ve basically been fed lies for the past seven years stung a little and scrambled my damn brain. I shouldn’t have let him go, and I’ve been berating myself ever since he walked out that door.”
“You care about him,” Boris says with a knowing smile. “I knew it would happen.”
