Page 45 of Always Darkest


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The words, that voice, floated all around her in the cavernous, dark room. He said goodnight to her, she heard it, she knew she did, but he hadn’t moved his lips at all.

11

October

Saber heard nothing but a quiet, thudding pulse.

Otherwise, there was silence, and softness, and the feeling of cleanliness. She rolled in the bed, pulling a pillow over her face, trying to block out the light streaming through the huge window, as well as her memories from the night before. She wasn’t ready to start thinking about it all yet.

Her mind lurched, and she willed herself to return to sleep, but after a while, it was impossible, and the truth, the horrible humiliating truth of everything she had said and done the night before came flooding into her mind.

“Good morning, Saber.” The voice was so sweet and melodic that it sounded like a recording.

Saber pulled the pillow down off her face and peaked over the top to see Lia standing in the doorway, gazing at her kindly, and without judgment.

“I have fresh coffee on downstairs, in the kitchen.”

Saber nodded.

“Thank you,” she managed to say. “I think that’s exactly what I need.”

Lia smiled.

“I think that’s exactly what you need, too.”

Downstairs, there was a smooth silver tray on the kitchen island with a carafe of coffee, a small white pitcher of cream, and a crystal bowl of sugar complete with a tiny silver spoon. There was also a little bouquet of flowers that made Saber want to cry for some reason.

“I’m sorry you went through all this trouble.”

Lia smiled politely.

“It’s my pleasure,” she said. “Would you like some toast? Yogurt and fruit?”

“I don’t think I’m hungry. I think I was drugged last night…?”

“Ansel told me. We’re glad you’re safe.”

“I said the most embarrassing things.”

Lia smiled again and tilted her head to one side.

“Woman to woman? Ansel is probably the least judgmental person I have ever met. Hetrulydoesn’t care. He was only concerned for your well-being and he’s relieved that you’re safe.”

“Somehow that makes it even worse.”

Lia patted her shoulder with a soft, cool hand.

“You’re so young,” she said, and sighed. “You haven’t done anything wrong, and you have nothing to worry about.”

“Sorry, I know you’re working. You don’t have to pretend to feel sorry for me.”

“I am working, but I don’t feel sorry for you. I feel sympathy for you. Everyone who has ever been a teenage girl has done something enormously embarrassing.”

Saber took a sip of her coffee.

“This is good,” she said flatly. “Like,reallygood.”

“Drink up and let me know when you need a ride.”

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