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I might as well have been the one down there, my throat ripped to pieces, my heart stilled forever. Again, I had failed, and never before had I felt this useless and unworthy. Ice filled me, the cold overwhelming. All I saw was Alec, discarded on the ground like rubbish.
Yelps sounded as the rest of the monsters descended upon the fallen boy, the leader stepping back to allow his brethren to feast on the remains. A horde of them lunged at Alec, their teeth flashing, their steel eyes full of hunger.
I lost track of my friend entirely, his body covered by whirling limbs and glinting teeth. The bile that rose in my throat burned, the heat painful against the icy cold flooding my veins.
Jude and I watched it all. We stayed rooted even as the other recruits were led away, taken back to gods knew where. But we were unable to pull away from the grisly sight of Alec’s murder. Hissacrifice.
I ached in places I didn’t know existed.
Thesethingswere creatures of the Mist. Cursed and far more monstrous than anything I could have imagined. My blood boiled as the last of Alec disappeared into the mouth of a petite female, one of his eyes dangling from the lips of a man missing his nose.
I refused to sit here and watch as the others were eaten and tortured. I’d rather die myselftryingto save them than simply watch from above—a coward.
Uncle Micah would have told me to run, that saving them was pointless and a waste of time. He was a harsh man who rarely showed kindness, least of all to me. But he’d taught me how to defend myself, all so that I could have a chance to survive this world.
“When a battle seems lost, Kiara, you retreat,” he’d told me one day as we’d trained, thick pellets of rain pounding into my skin, my eyes, my hair. Micah had thrust forward, prepared to deliver a blow to my ribs, when I’d shifted at the last second, veering right. “As much as it might pain you, sometimes withdrawing from a fight will help you win the war.”
I had growled at him, out of breath and on the verge of collapse. He’d pushed me hard those last couple of months, like he’d been attempting to cram years of training into just a few short weeks. “I’ll never retreat,” I’d snarled, wind whipping at my hair. “No one can break me.” Because that’s what retreat felt like—giving up all that I was.
Uncle had stilled, and I’d begrudgingly lowered my fists. “Then you will die a pointless death, Kiara,” he’d said, his cold eyes hard and lined with fury and disappointment. “And all of this will mean nothing.”
Looking down at the village, where Alec had been shredded to pieces, I thought on that particular memory, a day months before I’d been recruited.
Micah had punished me for my insolence later, and I’d all but crawled home, bruises dotting my arms and legs, aching from the ensuing hits to my body. I’d never claimed he was a compassionate man, my uncle, but I respected him.
He might want me to retreat, but all of Micah’s harsh training, all of his brutal lessons, had only strengthened my resolve to never give in.
I met Jude’s eyes, and a knowing look passed between us.
“I hope you have a plan, commander,” I ground out between my teeth, my wrath flourishing as adrenaline coursed through my veins and swirled about my blackened heart.
Jude’s left brow twitched. “I assume you do?”
“We’re going to kill them all.”
Or die trying.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Jude
While awaiting your aid, I came across a young woman named Cael. She grasped my arm and said she saw the creatures that stole her neighbors away. She claimed they wore thick cloaks and masks that covered their faces. But she also told me that she caught sight of one of the brutes when his mask slipped. And she said, with certainty, that these things were not human. They were pure evil.
Letter from Randall Thorne of the Guard to
unknown recipient, year 49 of the curse
A plan of this magnitude was no simple thing to work out. It required all evening and the following morning to prepare, Kiara and I both finding very little sleep.
Logic once again argued against her, with her plan to save her friends.
I was so close to telling her no, prepared to have her curse my name. I would have taken every slur, every blow, because her hating me would have been better than the alternative; Kiara being killed at the hands of these monsters.
Then I looked into her eyes. Nothing I could say or do would change her mind, and if I prevented her from going after her friends, not only would she hate me, butIwould hate myself as a result.
In my years under the king’s service, I hadn’t questioned his cruel demands, knowing that if I did, I would face a fate worse than death. Kiara would have questioned it, though. No matter what Cirian might have demanded from her, she’d stubbornly follow the code of morals I knew to be ingrained in her very spirit.
Besides, if it had been Isiah down there, I wouldn’t have even thought about it. Which was why I told her we would strike the next day and try to save the remaining recruits. I didn’t need to tell her that the odds weren’t in our favor.
