Page 62 of Thin Ice


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My ears rang, and I shook my head to clear the noise. “Sorry? What did you say?”

Lucy dropped her arms to her sides and slid her fingers into her jeans pockets. “I don’t want to give this up.”

“But… what about your dad?” I couldn’t let myself believe she meant it. It would only hurt worse later when the truth came out. “He was pretty clear what would happen. He threatened to trade Zachary.”

A smile curved her lips. “I know. And now he’s decided that Zachary will stay.” She took a step closer to me, like she knew I was the one who needed convincing.

I didn’t. Not really. I needed to know she wouldn’t change her mind and boot me out the door when things were hard.

“I told him about you. All of you.” Her words were quiet but firm. “He knows everything. He was shocked at first, but he’s willing to relax his rules and let us be happy. No one has to leave the team. I don’t have to quit my job. We can be together.”

Really? I ran my palms down my thighs to try and soothe away the tension. It didn’t work, and Justin sent me a look that I couldn’t interpret to mean anything other thantold you. I wanted to punch the fucker for no good reason. My typically calm attitude vanished quicker than a breath on the ice.

“What about your advocacy?” I pushed the issue. I had to. I needed answers.

She took another step, bringing her lilac scent close. “That’s where it gets tricky.” Her shoulders lifted and lowered on a deep breath that rattled around the room. “I think we should hold a press conference. That article about me and Zachary started a fire that we need to put out. The more we try to hide our relationship, the worse it will look when it’s discovered. And they will figure it out.”

She had a point. The media loved nothing more than a juicy story. They’d make one up if they could, as that reporterhad already proved. Even though he was right, that story never should have run. But that’s what drew people in. Gossip and rumors.

“Press conference?” Zachary palmed his cheek. “It’s not a bad idea. We can get ahead of the storm. Put it all out in the open now. Show the world without any hesitation. Make it clear we’re not trying to hide.”

“I’m not going to slink around and pretend like I’m not having a relationship with all of you.” She shrugged. “Not anymore. I love you all too much to hurt you like that. I understand if it’s too much. That’s why I wanted to bring you all here and talk to you before we move forward. There won’t be any hard feelings on my part if you decide this is not what you want.”

She’d just admitted she loved us and gave us a way out all at the same time. She’d taken the words right out of my mouth.

“And this will not interfere with your advocacy?” I asked again.

She met my eyes and shook her head. “I’ve already spoken to the head of the advocacy center. She’s behind me one hundred percent. What happens in my personal life should not interfere with my goals. She reassured me that she’ll do everything in her power to make that clear and nothing about my campaigns will change.”

I could be angry that she’d gone behind our backs and revealed our relationship to her father and the woman at the center. I could, but I didn’t have the energy for anger. I was too stunned. I’d been telling myself this was over all day. To hear that it wasn’t, that Lucy still wanted to be with us, it took me a minute to shift my mental gears.

“Are you sure this is what you want?” I stood and crossed to Lucy. I didn’t touch her, knowing I couldn’t trust myself if I had her in my arms. “If we do this, there’s no going back. Our decision will follow us all the rest of our lives.”

“Lennox,” Justin warned.

I shook my head at him. “No. We all need to take a minute and think this through.” I knew my answer. Lucy was what I wanted. That was the problem. I wanted her so much I was willing to overlook the ramifications of her decision. I held her gaze. “You understand what this means? The media frenzy may never die down. Every time we win, there’s a chance they’ll run the story again. Are you prepared for that? What about Abigail? What will you tell her when her friends say mean things because they’ve heard their parents talking?”

“Why are you doing this?” She gripped my shirt in both fists and pulled me close enough to see the sparks of anger igniting in her eyes. Realization dawned. “You’re trying to push me away. Why? What are you afraid of?”

The question startled me into admitting the truth. “I’m afraid I’ll have to give you up. If that’s going to happen, I need it to be now and not later.” Losing her later would be so much worse.

“I want you, Lennox. And Justin and Zachary. Nothing can change my mind about that. It’s true that I’m asking for a lot. I’m asking the world to accept something different. That’s never without issues. But this is who I am. I fight for what I want, and I don’t quit.” Her palms smoothed over my shirt, then around my neck and into my hair. “There’s no going back for me. I’m not letting you go unless it’s whatyouwant.”

And we’d come full circle. I’d tried to tell myself to walk away. That it was best for Lucy. But one look at Justin told me he wasn’t going anywhere. We’d all agreed to do what Lucy wanted. I’d been prepared to walk away. I hadn’t dared let myself dream that she’d ask us all to stay.

“Sounds like she’s made up her mind.” Justin stood and stretched. A cocky grin crawled across his face. “I’m not about to try and change her mind. This is what I want.”

“There’s something else we need to do.” Zachary stood too. “We need to talk to the team.”

“Good point.” I huffed a sigh. “They deserve to hear this from us. I can’t believe your dad is okay with this.” I imagined her telling her dad she’d had sex with three different men and shook my head. How much did he know, exactly?

Lucy’s cheeks pinked. “Well, it came as a bit of a shock. But he came around. Dad wants what is best for me, but he also wants me to be happy.”

And he wasn’t sure that a polyamorous relationship was what was best for Lucy. I understood the sentiment. I’d had the same thought multiple times. Well, there wasn’t much I could do about it now, unless I was willing to leave her. That sure as shit wasn’t happening now that I knew she was willing to take up the fight.

The least I—or any of us—could do was stand alongside her. Fight alongside her. We couldn’t ignore the upcoming battle or pretend it didn’t exist.

Lucy made a valid point. The best way to do this was to be honest from the beginning. What would our team think? I voiced the question. “What if our teammates want us gone?”

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