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“No, I’m good,” I say. “I . . . uhh . . . don’t exactly know what I’m supposed to say in this situation, so I’m just gonna . . . yeah.”
I don’t bother finishing whatever the fuck I was trying to say or even offer a goodbye before slipping out the door and bolting out of the private room like my ass is on fire. All that matters is getting as far away from Izaac Banks as possible and hoping like fuck that I didn’t just royally fuck everything up.
20
IZAAC
Idon’t know how, but I’m still fucking baffled by what just went down. Somehow, I fucked up.
The door closes behind Aspen, and all I can do is stare after her. One minute we were on the couch, my cock still buried inside her warm cunt as she straddled me, and the next, we were tiptoeing around each other like fucking strangers. I don’t know where the fuck we went wrong.
Physically being with her is incredible. The way we work together, the way she fits me, the way she gets off on my demanding nature. It’s fucking perfect, so how the fuck did it go so wrong?
Maybe I pushed her too far, or maybe she decided it was too hard to take the emotion out of sex. I’m not going to pretend like I didn’t notice the way she almost closed off moments before I came in her mouth. I saw the panic in her eyes, but she didn’t give me the impression that she was willing to talk about it. Instead, she seemed intent on forgetting, which is part of the reason why I allowed us to continue. If I felt something was truly wrong, I would have cut it short and called it a night.
But the way she just ran out of here . . . I don’t know. I’ve known Aspen all her life, and she’s never once tried to get away from me like that, not even when I was entertaining other women. The mood shifted almost instantly, and what was supposed to be a post-sex fog turned into a chilling awkwardness.
I fucking hated it. Hell, even standing here still feels wrong.
She wasn’t expecting me to cuddle, was she? Because I thought I made the limitations of this deal clear. She knew what she was getting into, and despite her feelings, she was more than happy to agree. I thought we were on the same page.
Maybe I misjudged her, or maybe she flat-out lied. She said there wouldn’t be a problem. She was down with the conditions of our fucked-up little back-stabbing arrangement, but if she’s not, if she can’t handle this, then tonight is as far as it will go. The whole point of stabbing Austin in the back was to make things right with Aspen, and if this arrangement is only going to hurt her, then what’s the fucking point?
Still staring after her, I will myself to forget it. If she wanted to talk it out, she would have stayed. Hell, knowing Aspen, she would have had it out here and now, not sparing anyone’s feelings. She’s feisty like that, especially with Austin. She doesn’t like holding back, nor should she, but on the other hand, things are never that simple when it comes to the two of us. She spent two weeks ignoring me after she found out I was her faceless stranger, and now, I’ve just let her run out of here again.
Fuck. Am I about to have another two weeks of silence?
What if I hurt her? What if it was too much and her heart is breaking? What if I pushed her too far? I know we agreed that it was just sex, but when she was riding me, there’s no denying that it felt different. That wasn’t just sex, that was personal, and when I forced her gaze to mine . . . I’ve never come like that. I’m not going to lie, I struggled tonight. If she were any other woman, I wouldn’t have had a problem, but with Aspen, it’s a dangerous game, and we’re toeing a line that either one of us could crash right over at any given time. She’s already vulnerable when it comes to me, and if I’m not careful, I’ll be the one who struggles to maintain the line between sex and emotion.
Shit.
Either way, something happened in here, and I’m not down with being in the dark. If I fucked up, I need to know so I can fix it.
I’m out the door before I even know what’s happening. I race through my club, the VIP lounge still in full swing, but I barely notice, certain she’s not lingering around. At least, she better not be, especially with the likes of Ryatt Markin here tonight, fuckinghuntingfor women.
God, I can’t stand that asshole. That fucker is getting way too bold with her.
Hitting the stairs, I fly up them two at a time before reaching the main floor and making my way to the entrance. Grabbing the handle, I yank it open before storming through to the reception area and scaring the shit out of Casey. She yelps, and I whip toward her, my gaze wide and frantic. “Did Aspen come through here?”
Her lips press into a hard line. “I really don’t understand what you see in that girl,” she muses, hurt flashing in her eyes that only serves to piss me off. “Did you honestly offer her a full membership? You know we have a waitlist, right? And don’t even get me started on the membership fee. I know she didn’t pay for it, which is totally unfair to our other members. Besides, she doesn’t even fit with our current clientele, so what’s your deal with her?”
“Since when did I give you the impression that you had a say or even a right to question my judgment on the way I run my business?” I ask, anger bubbling to the surface. “I asked you if Aspen came through here, and all I require from you is a simple yes or no answer.”
Casey visibly swallows, her gaze dropping like the desperate sub that she is. “Yes, sir,” she says, not daring to lift her gaze from her feet and making me regret for the millionth time ever touching her, but desperate men call for desperate measures. “You just missed her.”
Casey’s heavy into BDSM, and while I’ve dabbled here and there and enjoy being a dominant, she takes her role as a submissive way too fucking seriously. I prefer my women with a backbone. I like it when they argue back. Hell, I even like it when they want to challenge me and take control, and sooner or later, I know that Aspen will. She’s still finding her feet, though.
Done with Casey’s bullshit, I skip up the stairs, grabbing the railing and using it to propel me up them faster, and before I know it, I’m in the entrance hallway and barging through to the dark alley. I hurry out to the road and let out a heavy sigh of relief as I find Aspen’s white Corvette.
She sits in the car, the engine running, and it’s clear I have all of two seconds to catch her before she takes off.
I make every second count.
Hurrying around her car and putting myself in the street, I grab the handle of the driver’s door and pull it open wide, watching as Aspen shrieks with fear, clearly assuming I’m some asshole on the street wanting to take advantage of a beautiful woman.
“Fuck, Izaac. What the hell do you think you’re doing? You scared the shit out of me.”
I clench my jaw, unsure why I suddenly feel so worked up. “What the fuck just happened back there?” I question. “One second we were good, and the next, shit got weird. Why’d you run like that? If I did something, you need to tell me. You can’t just run away and leave me in the fucking dark.”
