AllFreeNovel
Share Us
She gapes at me as though I’m fucking clueless and should know better, and all it does is piss me off. She’s fucking right, though, Iamclueless, and I probablyshouldknow better.
Clearly seeing that I’m not interested in playing stupid games, she lets out a heavy sigh and cuts the engine, fixing me with a heavy stare. “You made me feel dirty.”
My jaw practically dislodges from my face as it falls to the fucking ground. “The fuck? What are you talking about?” I demand, my mind racing through everything that just went down and coming up almost blank. “Was it the balls? I thought you were okay with that shit.”
Aspen groans, rolling her eyes. “It’s got nothing to do with the fucking balls.”
“Then feel free to clue me in at any time.”
The hardness in her eyes fades away before being left with a vulnerability that makes something ache in my chest. “You made it transactional, Izaac,” she says, her shoulders sagging with the heaviness of what she’s trying to say. “I know we agreed that it was just sex. I get that, I really do. But when you sent me on my way, you made me feel like I was some stranger off the street when, despite everything you say, you and I both know that it’s more than that.”
“It’s not more than that,” I argue, practically feeling my walls slamming into place. The drunk phone call and texts, the dirty talking. I know I was bold with her, but perhaps I’ve led her on, and that really wasn’t my intention.
“But it is,” she fires back at me. “No matter what you say, it’ll always be more than that because, whether you like it or not, we have history. We’ve known each other all our lives, and while I agree that it’s just sex, I won’t agree to being treated like some second-class whore. What just happened in there was the equivalent of being kicked out after a one-night stand before you even got a chance to steal the guy’s shirt. I mean, fuck, Izaac! I had your dick halfway down my esophagus! Don’t you think that’s at least deserving of being offered a drink after?”
I just stare at her, a slight smirk lifting the corner of my lips. “Are you saying you want to . . .” I swallow hard, “cuddle?”
Her face falls, staring at me as though she wasn’t sure she was even speaking the same language. “When the hell did you hear me say that I wanted to cuddle? Fuck, Izaac. You know you’re impossible, right?”
“I’m impossible? You’re the one who ran away because you wanted to cuddle.”
“For the last fucking time,” she says, the frustration burning in her green eyes. “I DON’T WANT TO CUDDLE!”
“Shit, Aspen. Why don’t you tell the whole fucking street our business?”
Aspen flies out of the driver’s seat, her fingers jammed into my chest. “I swear to God, I’m going to reach down your throat and pull your testicles out through your mouth and strangle you with them,” she grits through a clenched jaw. “Now leave me alone. I’m going home so I can make a little Izaac voodoo doll and drown it.”
“No.”
She gapes at me. “What do you meanno?”
“I mean that you’ve only been giving me bullshit answers because you’re either embarrassed about something or too fucking scared to say what’s really going on. So, cut the shit and tell me what’s really going on.”
Aspen clenches her jaw and fixes me with a hard stare, her hands propped on her hips as though trying to intimidate me into backing off, but she should know better than to try that shit on me.
“I’m waiting,” I tell her. “I’ve got all fucking night.”
Aspen groans. “Fine,” she says. “We need to revisit the ground rules.”
My face scrunches in confusion. “Why? What’s wrong with our ground rules? We have them for a reason, and I don’t know if you were in there, but they worked fucking well.”
Her lips pull into a hard line, and she drops her gaze, studying my hands a little too closely. “You said you didn’t want me falling in love with you. Is that still true?”
My brows furrow, unsure of what she’s getting at. “Yes.”
“Then we need to adjust the ground rules.”
“What are you talking about, Aspen? Stop dancing around it and just say what you need to say.”
She lets out a heavy breath, and I hate the flash of nervousness in her eyes. She should know not to be nervous around me, especially after what we just did. “When you’re inside of me, no eye contact.”
“What?” I scoff, having to keep myself from laughing at the absurdity of that request. “Why the fuck not?”
“Because when you’re making me feel all these things, and it’s so damn good, I’m already on edge. But then you go and look at me, and not just a quick glance, you force me to hold your stare, and it’s too much. It’s electrifying, and it makes something that’s already there so much more intense. I don’t know if it’s because there’s already something there for me, or if it’s all just in my head, but when you look at me the way you do, especially when you’re inside of me and you’re just about to come, it makes me want something that you’re not willing to give. But when I look away, that connection breaks, and it’s fine, but I’m not going to lie, it leaves me feeling . . . shaky.”
I watch her for a second, already shaking my head before I even know what’s going to come out of my mouth. “No, fuck that,” I say, not sure if I’m about to fuck everything up even more. All I know is that the idea of not having her eyes on me when I thrust deep inside of her doesn’t sit well with me. “I don’t know about you, but for me, when your eyes are on me, I fucking love it. I can read you so easily. You’re an open book, Aspen. I see exactly how much you want it from the look in your eyes. It’s not your body language that tells me if you want it faster or slower, or the sound of your desperate pants, it’s those fucking eyes. There’s gotta be a compromise here somewhere, because losing that eye contact, that’s a hard pass for me.”
“Have I told you you’re impossible lately?”
