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There was relief in their voices at another silence between them being broken. Their concerns about Joseph having known Maggie, and their attempts to find out if he had worked at St. Cuthbert’s had brought them together briefly. But now the distance was back.
Beth moved from the kitchen doorway and they followed her onto the terrace, Gabriel carrying his mug of coffee. A million possibilities flew through Iris’s mind at what Beth could possibly want to tell them that merited sitting down at a table. She watched Beth closely as she pulled out a chair and sank onto it. She’d seemed happier lately and Iris knew she had Esme to thank for that.
Gabriel threw Iris a look, telling her to hurry up and sit down. From the way he was running his hand through his hair she could tell how nervous he was and guessed that the thought uppermost in his mind was that Beth was going to tell them she had some terrible illness.
“What’s up, Bethie?” he said, when he couldn’t bear the suspense any longer.
“Okay—well, I’ve asked to defer for a year. I don’t feel ready to go to university yet.”
“Oh,” Iris said, unable to keep the surprise from her voice.
“I will go,” Beth said quickly. “Just not this year.”
Relief whooshed out of Gabriel. “That’s fine, Beth, we completely understand.” He turned to Iris. “Don’t we?”
“Yes, of course, if you don’t feel ready. Are you sure they’ll agree to defer you?”
“I hope so. I emailed and explained everything—you know, about Pierre and Laure—and I think they will, on compassionate grounds.”
“And do you have any plans? Will you try and get some work experience? I don’t mean straightaway, I know you probably want to chill for a bit.”
Beth reached up, pulled the scrunchie from her ponytail and shook out her hair. “Chill for a bit, definitely. If you and Dad can bear having me stay a while longer,” she added with a smile.
“That goes without saying,” Gabriel said. “You know you can stay for as long as you like.”
Iris nodded. “I think you’ve made the right decision, Beth. You’ve been through a lot, you need some downtime.”
Beth got to her feet and hugged each of them in turn. “Thank you for understanding. Why don’t we go out for lunch? My treat, for you being the best parents in the world.”
Iris smiled. “That’s a lovely idea. But I don’t think your dad will let you pay.”
“You’re absolutely not paying.” Gabriel couldn’t hide his delight at Beth’s decision to defer for a year, and Iris realized that if she stayed with them that whole time, it would be the longest she’d ever lived with them since she was eleven years old. Her heart flickered at the thought that this would be the chance to really get to know her, a chance for them to forge the mother-daughter bond she’d always feltwas missing. She glanced at Beth as she chattered happily to Gabriel about where to go for lunch, and wondered if Beth had ever felt that there was something lacking in their relationship, if she’d ever felt the slight holding back on her part. She pushed the guilt away. Beth was happy and confident; she must have done something right.
Gabriel took out his phone and managed to find a table for three at a pretty pub they liked. There was a choice between a table at twelve fifteen or a later booking at two.
“Two o’clock would be better,” Iris said. “We’d have to leave now otherwise.”
“Actually Mum, would you mind if we go for the twelve fifteen?” Beth asked. “I told Esme I’d go and give her a hand with Hamish this afternoon.”
Iris gave her a quick smile. “No problem.”
“Great. Is that okay with you, Dad?”
“Yes, of course. Hold on, just let me book it. Done.” He looked up from his phone. “Right, let’s get in the car.”
Beth pushed up from the table. “I need to get my bag!” she called, disappearing into the house.
Iris looked at Gabriel. “That’s the pub where we used to go with Laure and Pierre.”
A shadow passed over his eyes. “I know. But we went to a lot of places around here with them. We can’t avoid them forever. We need to get on with our lives, live for the moment. We’ve seen firsthand how things can change in an instant. Let’s enjoy life while we can, make the most of Beth being here, get our lives back on track.” He reached for her hand. “What do you think?”
For the first time in a long time, Iris felt a small tug of something positive. “I think that’s a very good idea,” she said.
56
Gabriel’s phone rang. He stopped digging, rummaged in his pocket, brought out his phone and glanced at the screen. The call was from an unknown number. He wasn’t going to bother answering but remembering that Beth had borrowed their car to go and visit one of her school friends, he accepted the call, his heart already racing.
“Gabriel?” He couldn’t place the voice, and his fear that Beth had had an accident increased.
