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I cleared my throat.
“So, perhaps it’s not that you’re broken or unable to open yourself up to another. Maybe you were just looking in the wrong place.”
“But that’s…” Crazy? Ludicrous? “I haven’t even broken up with Curtis. I can’t just suddenly start dating Macon.”
There was a brief pause before she said, “Seems to me like you kind of already are.”
* * *
I tried pushing Elena’s words to the back of my mind the following morning as I walked over to Macon’s rental.
I couldn’t think about Macon until I got through this morning.
Then…
Well, then I had no idea.
My stomach did a flip-flop as I thought about it.
Could I really just jump from one man to the next?
I’d only dated two people in my entire life.
Two.
Daniel had been my first and only boyfriend until Curtis.
In the back of my mind, I never really thought about a future with Curtis. I guessed maybe that should have been a clue. Every time he brought it up, I’d get that same feeling of panic rise in my chest that consumed me the night of his proposal.
Was I even ready to entertain the idea of another relationship?
I hadn’t even broached the idea that Macon might not want to?—
Those thoughts had been swirling in my head since the moment I had woken up. And the longer I was awake, the more and more they spiraled out of control. After a lengthy shower and three cups of coffee, I had finally worked up the courage to text Curtis to let him know I would be coming over to talk.
His one-worded reply told me he probably already assumed the worst.
I took my time walking there, a poor attempt to enjoy the fresh ocean air and the brisk autumn weather. It didn’t have anything to do with the fact that I was stalling.
Not at all.
Eventually, I found myself standing in front of a small one-story yellow house. The grass had recently been mowed, and the landscaping had that same simple and clean aesthetic Macon had chosen for his own home.
There was a sign by the front door that said,Welcome to Ochre Bay.
He’d named his rental. Why did I find that ridiculously cute?
I suddenly wanted to know what the rest of them were called and what they looked like.
Focus, Marin.
I took a long, deep breath and tried to pull myself together, placing a hand in my coat pocket as I stepped forward.
Just then, the door opened, and Curtis stepped out.
He was freshly showered, his brown hair wet and brushed back. He held a coffee cup in his hand, and from the look on his face, I could tell he hadn’t slept well.
That made two of us.
