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“All evidence to the contrary. You never answered me before. What is this so-called pack of yours doing to help you recover your health?”
“They’ve helped, of course, but mostly they’ve been leaving it up to the professional healers.”
“I see. In other words, not a fucking thing. All right. I’ll take care of it myself then. I’m in charge of you anyway now that you’re my captive.”
“I don’t need someone to be ‘in charge’ of me. I’m not some helpless omega. You can’t do this.”
“Watch me.”
“Roxbury, what’s wrong with you? I-I understand you’re worried, but this is silly—I’m not your slave.”
“You’re whatever I say you are, and I’m not worried. Why would I worry about you? I’m only interested in protecting my investment.”
He pushed me back against the mattress, though, looming over me, pressing his heat and strength into me, and because I didn’t want to fight him, I let him do what he wanted. I hoped he’d get it out of his system. He wanted to humiliate me, make me feel powerless and under his control, or maybe he was even trying to prove a point. What that point was, I wasn’t sure, but I remembered from the old days that when he got that wild look in his eyes, there was simply no reasoning with him. He took me roughly into his arms and to my complete and utter shock, he kissed me. His lips were warm and full and lush against mine, and dangerously sweet. Oh gods, I’d thought I’d never feel him against me like this again, and I couldn’t bear to pull away.
“Do you remember when we were in school?” he whispered against my mouth, no doubt enjoying the shudders that racked my body as he did. “I used to back you up in the corner of that old cloak room and steal kisses from you after class. You loved them then like you do now.”
I didn’t care what he was saying. I just gave myself up to his embrace, just like I had back when we were in school—it had been a long time since I’d had him this close to me, and he’d been right about those kisses in the cloakroom. I remembered every second. Back then, we’d pretended we were “practicing on each other,” learning how to properly kiss so we’d be ready for our omegas. What frauds we’d been.
Worst of all, I was feeling something deep inside me beginning to crack. Maybe it was the ice around my heart. It had formed the day Lex and Harrison had sat me down and told me I couldn’t have silly, romantic “notions” about Roxbury. It was simply not possible for two Alphas to have romantic feelings for each other, and people wouldn’t understand. Most importantly, our families wouldn’t understand. Not only that, but I’d bring shame on them and on our pack. Two Alpha males together? Unheard of—it was against the rules of our society and wouldn’t be tolerated.
The ice formed that day had built up slowly over time until it froze out all the romantic notions I’d had, and the ice had solidified when I’d gotten word that he was dead. I’d been icebound for so long now that I think I’d forgotten how to feel. When I’d first heard Roxbury was lost at sea, I’d been almost glad, though I never admitted that even to myself. It meant I didn’t have to torment myself any longer wondering where he was and what he was doing, and if he’d found an omega to love and create a family with. To wonder if he still hated me or even worse, if he'd forgotten all about me.
I’d been like a person who lived in a haunted house, kept in the dark with Roxbury’s ghost drifting through the dark hallways as my constant companion. Or maybe I was like a character in a fairy tale, asleep for a hundred years, and I was just now waking up. But how could I be in love with another Alpha? My cousins had said our feelings for each other were unnatural and twisted. Other Alphas would laugh at me and say I was weak. My love for him was forbidden and unlawful.
“Wait,” I said, putting up a hand to press against his chest. “Roxbury, you have to stop this. We need to wait.”
“No. I’ve waited too long as it is. I let others—including you and your pack—tell me we could only be friends, and I’ve had enough of that. You’re on my ship and now I have you in my bed, and I have no intention of waiting another fucking second for what I want.”
“No, Roxbury, you can’t! I won’t let you.”
“Oh, shut up,” he murmured as he pulled me into his arms and brushed his lips over my mouth once and then again. “Just shut the hell up.”
Chapter Four
Roxbury
The sweet smell of arousal rolled off him in waves, making my cock tent out the fabric of my trousers. I knew it. I knew he wanted me as much as I wanted him. Were those pheromones? How could I smell them so plainly? Why was I so sensitive to his every passing emotion?
“That’s right. Close your eyes and just listen. Relax. You smelled so delicious that I couldn’t resist. Your scent has always been sweet, like cinnamon apples.”
He wasn’t struggling against me, and I wasn’t sure why. Did he feel this thing between us too, or was he only trying to ignore me? I wouldn’t force him, and I knew I had to let him go. Soon…but before I did, I lowered my head and whispered in his ear again. “I have a feeling that having my knot inside you is something you’d eventually learn to love, dearie. And you’d beg me for more.”
With that threat dangling in the air between us, I pulled away, the better to enjoy the outrage I expected to see in his eyes. Instead, and for only the briefest second, I saw something that looked like…longing. It was only there for a moment, so fleeting I might have imagined it, but it sent a powerful jolt of shock and—might as well admit it—lust, all through me, not to mention confusing the hell out of me too. He quickly recovered from whatever emotion he’d been feeling, and a flash of anger moved like a summer storm across his face.
“If you think I’ll just let you fuck me, then you need to think again. I’ll fight you, Roxbury. You know I will.”
Patiently, I waited for him to control his temper, though honestly, I could work with that too. I had known this was how it would be—the brashness that all Alphas were born with was a powerful thing. I would need to bring that down several notches and make a believer out of him. He needed to accept that there wasn’t one damned thing he could do about what was going to happen to him. I intended to make him mine, and so indisputably that he couldn’t deny it. Not ever.
What need did we have for the so-called rules of Morovia, a country we’d both just happened to have been born in?
I needed to make him fall in love with me again and want to make love to me, and then we’d go to my island, to Gilead, where I, alone, made the rules. Then I could reject him like he’d rejected me, and he’d be the one to suffer.
I had no idea what had first started this fever in my blood that aroused me whenever I was near him. But I’d had it since we first met and he was only sixteen. I’d claimed him as mine back then. I’d fought it at first, denied it, even turned my back on it, but it was too strong. When I was with him, it came roaring back. Maybe there was something wrong with my brain.
Or maybe what I was feeling was simple revenge for the way he’d hurt me. There was a fairly significant part of me that enjoyed watching him get so worked up about it now. He was going to learn some hard lessons one way or the other, along with some instruction on respecting me as his Alpha. I wanted him under me, subservient to me and my every wish. I would be the one who was in charge. I was his Alpha, and he would be…whatever I wanted him to be.
It was a narrow plank Brandon was forcing me to walk. He needed to understand, without a single doubt left in his mind that I was in control and that defying me would be futile. And somehow, I was going to have to achieve that without hurting him. Frankly, considering how stubborn he was, it seemed impossible unless I gained his cooperation.
