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In between the shopping, driving, and walking, I solved chemistry and physics equations at the beach. My dad gave me this book for Christmas a year ago. I’ve finished a lot of these books throughout the years. When things spun out of control, solving numerical problems calmed me down. Solving mathematical problems was easy; equations always gave me answers. Kieran used to ask me why I didn’t major in Physics or Math or Astrophysics and my answer always was, “Then, how will I be able to calm myself if that’s what I did every day?”
I knew I probably had a borderline obsessive-compulsive disorder; I liked to control things that I could control. I found comfort in numbers. Literally. Normally, solving 5 problems calmed me down. Today, 15 tempered down my anxiety. My control was slipping. Not a good sign.
Thoughts of Zander and his effect on my life lingered. When I reached my place, I figured Nalee and Tanya weren’t home yet because the apartment was double-locked from the outside. I felt relaxed as I sat on the couch after changing into my pink Hello Kitty T-shirt and matching shorts. This was a gift from Nalee. She loved the stuff and since she couldn’t hoard the stuff without looking crazy, she bought it for her friends too. She used Tanya and me as an excuse to buy more Hello Kitty stuff.
I laid my legs atop the dark brown ottoman and turned on the TV. After scrolling through the channels, I settled on the Food Network.
I was about to end my phone calls/phone text hiatus, when I heard the doorbell ring.
It was probably Nalee. She always forgot her keys.
I was wrong.
Standing on the other side of the door was the guy who caused all the raucous this morning. In his low-rise dark blue jeans, off- white shirt, and slightly mussed hair, he reminded me of the strawberry sundae that I had this afternoon. Sweet, dripping with goodness, and lickable. And boy, when he looked at me those gorgeous eyes of his, coupled with a slight smile on his slightly reddened lips, my womb clenched.
His eyes smoldered in heat as he took in my outfit.
“Hey,” his voice husky. He scanned my face as if he was looking for something in my expression.
I stared at him for what must have been like a few seconds, maybe a minute, mesmerized by his heated look.
“Hi,” I said awkwardly. I stepped aside to let him in.
As he passed me by, I smelled the clean, masculine scent that was naturally his. My body was heating up and his nearness was sending my pheromones into overload.
We walked a few steps to the couch. The short trip gained me unobstructed view of his sexy ass. Oh, he was really sexy all over. I could wrap myself around him, feel his muscular arms, and maybe mess his hair up a bit.
Why was I having such dirty, naughty thoughts? Granted he was a sexy man. But I’ve seen tons of handsome, sexy men. Only Zander elicited such primal, naughty thoughts from me. I tried to focus on the sound coming from the TV. It didn’t help when all I heard was ‘Yummy’, ‘Delicious’, and ‘Mmmm’ from the host.
I signaled Zander to sit. The man actually waited for me to invite him to sit! Who did that, nowadays?
He took up most of the room of the small sofa.
I broke the silence first.
“What’s up?” I bit on my lower lip, trying my best not to have those lustful thoughts be reflected in my eyes.
He slightly averted his eyes when he said, “I kinda thought we had fun last night, but maybe I was wrong.”
Yeah, he was right. I came to the same conclusion today. He was wrong for me. I was wrong for him. I did not like the havoc that his presence created in my life. I did not want to feel this burning feeling every time he was near me. I did not want to have lusty thoughts! I wanted to be the same, old me.
He continued, “I haven’t heard from you today. Makes me think that you’re blowing me off,” I gave him my phone number last night before he left.
He was rubbing his palms together, looking uncomfortable in the sofa. He touched his tongue to the top of his teeth and all I could stare at was the movement of his tongue.
He cleared his throat.
Again, I was mesmerized by this man. I felt my face heat up. My ears, revealed by the low ponytail I was wearing, was probably redder than my face.
“I’m sorry.” Obviously, I need to pay attention to what he was saying. Concentration was a task when his eyes were piercingly beautiful and his face was absolutely gorgeous and his mouth looked wickedly good.
“Don’t take offense, Sedona-” he started to say, the edge of the right side of his mouth turning up.
“For what?” I fiddled with the remote control in my hand.
“Even your blush is sexy,” as soon as those words came out of his mouth, I felt the temperature in the room spike up. My heart lurched in my chest; I was probably experiencing hot flashes in my 20s. Was this normal or was this Zander-induced hyperthermia?
“Oh,” as I swallowed. How did a girl respond to that? I tried to change the subject.
