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“God, Ryan, for someone to survive that? She moved back in with her parents and had to quit her job to recover while eating mashed potatoes through a straw for two months. Once she healed enough, she moved two states away to start a new life. That’s pretty badass to leave the only life you’ve known behind to make yourself new again.”
My chest becomes heavy, and I rub at the center, willing the pain to subside. “And she didn’t date for two years. Until she met me.”
“She must have seen something in you to let you get past those walls.”
“And look what I did.”
Corey sighs. “You don’t need to beat yourself up about it. Not for long anyways,” she teases. “I wanted you to put yourself in her shoes for a second. She knows how you feel about Mom, andgiven what she’s been through, I can see why she didn’t want to tell you. And in her defense, you reacted exactly how she feared you would. If she had told you sooner, I’ll bet you wouldn’t have dated her. Imagine if she told you a year down the road, how pissed would you have been then? There is no good time to tell someone something awful about yourself. But it’s real. It happened. You love her, you need to make this right.”
I huff out a laugh.“How’d you know?” How could Corey tell I love Lainey when I’m first realizing that myself?
“Because you let her touch you.”
Corey’s response hangs out in the air. “What do you mean?”
“Ryan, you hate being touched. I have to force my hugs on you, and you never hug me back. That night, I saw it from a mile away. You walked into the bar holding her hand, you had your arm around her as she sat in her chair. You were worried she couldn’t find the bathroom on her own. Youkissedher in front of me.”
She’s right. I hadn’t realized it before, but being with Lainey was the first time in my life that I wanted affection. I craved it. I craved her. And for the first time in forever, I wanted to be better for someone.
“Are you still there?”
I don’t know how long I had been sitting here, thoughts rumbling through my head while Corey waited. “Yeah.”
“Yeah.” Corey mocks my tone, and for the first time in three days, I let out a real laugh. And damn, it feels good.
“I don’t know what to do now, or how to fix this.” I clear my throat. “I’ve never wanted to be with someone so badly. What if she doesn’t feel the same anymore?”
“How about for once, tell her how you feel. Put on your big boy pants and be vulnerable.”
“Yeah …”
“That doesn’t sound too promising.”
“Yeah … no … I don’t know. I have to get back to work.”
“Well, you can be dumb, but I still love you. Fix this, Ryan. I like her.”
“Love you, too. Thanks for always being real with me, sis.”
After throwing the last of my coffee away, I’m about to head up to the fourth floor to find Lainey and grovel at her feet when I see a call coming through from the ER.
“Dr. Ryan.”
“Hey, it’s Jim. I have an admit that I hear is coming to you.”
Great. “What do we have?”
“He’s a doozie. Police busted him somewhere on Rush St, assaulting a prostitute, and brought him in for medical clearance before going to inpatient psych, but he needs to stay and detox. He’s got about everything in his system you can imagine—cocaine, alcohol, meth. He reminds me of those guys that were eating bath salts, all feral and wild as hell. We thought we were going to have to restrain him to the bed when the sedatives finally kicked in. He was here a few months ago for the same thing, minus the prostitutes. Had some seizures detoxing and spent nine days in ICU intubated.”
I rub my eyes. “Couldn’t have given me an easy one, could ya, Jim?”
“Not today, buddy. Introduce me to your girl’s hot red-headed friend and maybe I’ll give you an easy pass next time.”
“Oh shit, forgot to tell you that I’ve been working on that for you.” I’ve been so wrapped up in the world of Lainey that I hadn’t texted Jim her number yet.
“Wait, what?”
“I have her number. She might want to work in the ER, and I may have suggested she spend a day shadowing a certain ER doctor that I know.”
