AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Banks shrugs. "Like I said, he was angry. He said no doctors. We obeyed."
"And then he just got up again and carried on?" It's Ruby's turn to frown as she imagines him in this state.
"After a few minutes, yeah. He looked pretty rough, but we surrounded him so he wouldn't fall, got him up the stairs, and sat him in a chair for the meeting. He was quiet, but he got through it."
"Huh." Ruby says no more, but she's lost in thought as they sit there, listening to the rain taper off. "Okay. Thank you, Banks."
There are further reminders of Jack's rapid descent as the afternoon goes on and she reads more diary entries, and Ruby putters around the house with his journal in hand.
In her dresser upstairs is a stack of letters that Jack had sent her over the years, and she takes the letters out of the drawer, untying the ribbon that holds the yellowing envelopes together. It's late afternoon, and the sun has come out in full blaze as if the rainstorm was nothing but a figment of her imagination. She sits on the side of her made bed, the diary on the duvet next to her, the letters in her lap.
September 7, 1999
Oh, Ruby. Ahead of us lies everything! We can have it all. With you by my side, I believe I'll be President one day, and all the things we hope and believe can be brought to action. All the nights we've lain awake, talking about truth, equality, safety for our country's people...I want to be a part of the ongoing change that makes this the greatest nation in the world.
I love so many things about you, but one of the things I love most is your passion. Your feelings of action and not simply reaction. I know how much you care about kids and literacy, and I hope that being able to put your talents and passions to work in D.C. will somehow alleviate your sadness over not becoming a teacher. Though, if you wanted to do it, I would support you. If you wanted to go back to school and get a teaching degree, find a nice high school in the suburbs, and teach for a while, I'd be right behind you, cheering you on. Of course, a First Lady teaching at Theodore Roosevelt High School while her husband was at work in the Oval Office mightbe tricky (can you see I’m projecting ahead to our life in the White House?) I'm not sure there are enough Secret Service agents to tackle that project.
Regardless of what you choose to do with your life professionally, Rubes, you will always be the woman of my heart. My partner. My beloved. You will be the mother of my children. My best friend. My traveling companion.
You will be--forever, whether or not I end up in the White House--my eternal First Lady.
Ruby folds the letter and slips it back into the envelope. She selects another.
December 31, 2007
Darling--
I know I've been spending too much time abroad, but it's been necessary. There are things going on in Europe that I can't always talk about, but they're important too. I just need you to know that you are the best mother I could have asked for to raise our daughters. They are a wonder and a force of nature, just like you.
Please forgive me my absence, and please understand that there are parts of this job--of this life--that I must keep tucked away to protect you. Without reservation, I've loved our life together so far, and I can't thank you enough for being the woman you are.
Love,
Your Jack
Parts of his life that he had to keep from her to protect her--indeed! This letter fills Ruby with rage. Rather than folding it and putting it back, she flings it away, watching as it floats lightlyto the carpet, defying her anger and refusing to spontaneously combust and reflect the angry storm inside her.
He'd basically told her right there that he had a whole secret life--he'd even apologized for it! But of course Ruby hadn't knownhowto read between the lines of that note. Nor had she known that she was supposed to. A wave of angry, frustrated tears threatens to overtake her and she's about to put the letters back when the one on the bottom of the pile slides out, landing on her bare thigh. This one was left on her bedside table before Jack left for France for the last time. Like so many of his final writings, it is undated and the handwriting has grown smaller and more disorganized.
Ruby--
I'm leaving while you're out. I'm sorry for that. I need to go now. It's been a while since I wrote you a love note, so please accept this one.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Rubies are red
And my heart is too
Okay, I'm no poet. The great writers won't see me coming and fear that I'll crank out something better than they could. But my heart is red and full of love for you. The girls are wonderful creations--mostly yours. Our life is steady and true--because of you. I've done right and I've done wrong, and through it all, you've been at my side.
No matter what happens in this life, in yours, or in mine, I hope you never forget that I admire you. I believe in you. Sometimes I didn't give you what you needed, but I always gave you what I could.
I'll see you. Please be well.
Love,
