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Sam gasped and sat upright, alarming Colin in the process. When Sheilagh finally surfaced Sam gave a sigh of relief and sat back again, but her shoulders were uncomfortably knotted with tension.
“You don’t like water do you, Sammy?”
She turned sharply to Colin, prepared to deny such a silly fear, but when she saw nothing but compassion in his gaze she relaxed her defenses.
“No.”
“Why?”
She looked at him, knowing it was a normal question, but still resenting the breach of privacy. “I just don’t.”
“Did something happen to you?”
Fuck you, she wanted to say, but knew that was cruel and unjustified and definitely not the way one spoke to a priest. “I don’t like to talk about it.”
“Don’t like to or don’t?”
“Don’t.”
He nodded with understanding. “Fair enough.”
Colin leaned back in his chair and shut his eyes. Samantha continued to watch him a few moments longer before doing the same.
Normally okay with silence, Sam was uncharacteristically at odds with the quiet. Unable to tolerate it a moment longer she said, “I thought you had other things to do.”
The moment the somewhat snarky comment left her mouth she regretted it. Not only because it could be taken as rude, but because she also realized she might’ve disturbed him from taking a rest.
“Sorry.”
“No need to be sorry,” he said sitting up and draping his tanned arms over his knees.
How did a priest get so many muscles? He removed his glasses to look at her and Sam found the action unnerving. “I know I should’ve done what I intended, but the draw of sitting in the sun with friends and family was all too tempting.” His voice was so deep and soft at the same time.
“What did you have to do?”
He pressed his lips together as if he didn’t want to answer. After hesitating a moment longer he said, “I needed to get over myself, basically. Sometimes it’s confusing, approaching a change you’ve been preparing for practically your entire life. I guess you may be going through a bit of the same thing with graduating this summer and finally becoming a teacher.”
She could understand that. “It is a bit surreal.”
He nodded. “Surreal, yes, that’s a good word for it. I suppose it’s natural to feel suddenly insecure about something you spent years convincing yourself you were certain of. Did you ever want to be something besides a teacher?”
“A figure skater,” she whispered as the sense of a ghost passing through her sent chills up her arms. Why had she just admitted that?
“Really? That’s different. I used to want to be a firefighter, but my mother would’ve shot me first. Why did you change your mind?”
“I grew up.”
He frowned as if not understanding her answer. She wished he’d stop giving her that analyzing look. “Skating isn’t a fantasy job. There are plenty of adults that do it and make a living of it. Would you have wanted to compete in choreographed skating or in more of an athletic capacity?”
She snorted. “You’ve seen my athletic skills. Definitely not someone who excels in agility or grace. It was just something I dreamt of when I was a girl. Nothing more than a daydream.”
“Why dismiss something you’re passionate about?”
“Because I’m not. I was, but not anymore. Like I said, I grew up.” She sounded defensive, but she really wanted him to drop it.
“What made you grow up, Sammy?”
Her heart started to pound and she felt like she couldn’t breathe. Why was he being so persistent? Her forehead beaded with perspiration that had nothing to do with the heat of the sun. He seemed to notice a change and began to look around for something. What, she didn’t know.
