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He kissed the top of her head and down the side of her face.
“Oh, Sammy, I grow weary holding it all inside. So many times I wanted to say to hell with it all and come find you and demand you come back to me, but I didn’t think you would ever forgive me for letting you go. I was such a stupid fool to think I could wash away what we shared. I don’t think I will ever stop loving you and I don’t ever want to. That day of my ordainment, it was as though God was whispering to me, telling me he had a different plan. That plan was you, Sammy.”
His lips found the corner of her mouth and kissed her there. The familiar, almost forgotten touch filled her blood with such wanting she thought she would die if he stopped touching her.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered against her mouth.
“I’m sorry too.”
His fingers sifted through her hair and her ponytail loosened. He pulled her to him and kissed her hard as if he could not be gentle in that moment. She kissed him back with equal passion.
Her fingers went to the buttons of his flannel shirt and began quickly undoing them. His hands coasted down her back and held her firmly.
She felt like a whale when she tried to lean farther into him. She wanted to press herself against him, but her belly prevented her from doing so.
When she undid the last button she yanked his shirt off of his shoulders. He was bigger than before, more muscled, harder.
“I want to see you,” he breathed as he scattered kisses up the sensitive side of her neck and nibbled the lobe of her ear sending shivers through her body.
“I’m fat,” she whispered, as she ran her hands over his bared flesh.
He held her away from him and looked at her sternly, “No, Samantha, you are beautiful and that is my child you’re carrying. Do you know how magnificent that is to me, what a miracle it is to be creating life? Let me see you.”
Well, if he was going to put it that way… She lifted her shirt over her head then undid her hideously functional maternity bra. Tossing the offensive garment aside, she leaned back on her elbows and let him look his fill. His gaze was fixated on her belly. It was huge. Her belly button had somehow turned inside out and her skin was stretched thin.
He looked up at her in complete awe.
“You are the most stunning beauty I’ve ever looked upon. I don’t think I have ever even seen a painting of the Virgin Mary as breathtaking.”
She blushed when his focus moved to her breasts. They resembled nothing of what they were that summer.
“You’re nipples are darker,” he said and her blush intensified until she actually felt as though her face was on fire.
“The doctor says that’s normal.”
He looked at her with a mixture of excitement and curiosity. “And what about everything else? Have you had any other issues? Any trouble with anything? Does the doctor say you and the baby are healthy?”
“We’re both fine. Aside from a little heartburn I’ve had a fairly easy pregnancy. It makes me terrified for the delivery. I’m afraid because everything has been easy God will punish me with a thirty pound newborn.”
He laughed. “If it’s a boy he’ll likely be close to ten pounds. We were all big. But if she’s a girl, well, Sheilagh was only six-two. No matter what though, I’ll be there with you the whole time, Sammy. I’d take the pain for you if I could. I promise I’m not going anywhere.”
Her heart elated at his words, but like a knee jerk emotion her mind told her not to believe having Colin would ever be possible.
“What are you thinking? You look sad.”
“I’m wondering if this is really happening, that I’m actually here with you. I’ve dreamed this moment, or moments like this, a thousand times, but my mind always tells me I’m an idiot for entertaining such fantasies.”
He cupped his palm to the side of her face. “My love for you is no fantasy, Samantha. It’s the most real thing I’ve ever known.”
For once, she shed tears of joy. “I love you too, Colin. Thinking I would never be able to touch you again, kiss you, laugh with you, swim with you, it was the worse hell I’ve ever known. I don’t ever want to be without you again.”
“Marry me. Be my wife, Samantha, and make me whole again. I’m miserable without you.”
She laughed through her tears. “I’ve never wanted to belong to a family the way I want to belong to yours. I want to belong to you. Yes, I’ll marry you, Colin McCullough.”
He kissed her, and she knew that everything would finally be okay.
When they pulled apart they gazed at each other with unrefined lust in their eyes and unconditional love in their hearts.
