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Stepping back from my business and taking care of our child is nothing compared to that.
“Whatever you want to achieve in life, I want you to go after. I don’t want you to hold yourself back because you’re worried about who is going to care for the baby. We’re in this together.” I give her leg an affectionate squeeze.
“To be honest, I don’t think I’m going to continue to work at the club either. I’ve made more than enough money from your bribes and generous tips to be able to afford school and cover all my expenses.”
I roll my eyes and continue massaging her calf. “Hadley, there is no need for you to want for anything. If you don’t have the money for something, let me know. I have more money than I know what to do with.”
“I’m not going to just sit back and take your money.” She gives me a flat look. “I’m not the kind of woman who is going to stick around just because you’re paying her. I’m going to make a life for myself.”
“I have no problem with you doing that. However, I can help make it easier. You won’t have to worry about money and you can chase after whatever dreams you have.”
Hadley’s cheeks turn a slight shade of pink as she looks away from me. When she looks back at me, I can see a lingering suspicion in her eyes. Her gaze flits over me quickly, as if she can’t believe what she is hearing.
I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure that she has everything she needs out of life.
I don’t want her to feel like she’s being held back because we’re having a baby.
I’ll do whatever I can to make sure she lives the life she wants.
Hell, if she left me tomorrow and said that she never wanted to see me again, it would kill me but I would let her go.
All I want is for her to be happy.
Who the hell am I becoming?
“Jovan, I appreciate the offer but I want to earn what I have. Owing a debt to the cartel is something that I’m going to avoid.”
“It wouldn’t be a debt,” I say, slight irritation coloring my voice. “It would be me, helping the mother of my child.”
Her lips press together in a thin line and she looks away from me. Hadley pulls her knees to her chest, putting distance between us.
I don’t know what I said to upset her, but it’s clear that I said something. “Hadley, if you want the money, it’s there. If you want the connections to do whatever you want, they are there as well. I don’t want you to feel trapped by this life.”
“Yeah, well, it isn’t always about what you want. I’ve done what you wanted from the moment we met. I might have given you hell about it, but I’ve done what you asked. I’m living here, even though I would much rather be in the home I worked for.”
“Well, unlucky for you, this is your option right now,” I say, my tone harsh as I stand. “If you want to earn the money, then I will offer you a bigger cut. You will be a partner instead of an employee.”
“You always make our relationship sound entirely transactional.” Hadley’s eyes narrow. “Did you ever think that maybe the money and the connections don’t matter to me at all? I thought I was just hooking up with some stranger at a club. Instead, it turned out to be my boss who manipulated me. Who knew exactly who I was and figured out what he could gain from the entire situation.
“Is that really what you think of me?” I shake my head as she gets to her feet and crosses her arms. “I might not be the best man and what I did when we first met was fucked up. I’m sorry, but right now, I’m trying to focus on what comes next for us.”
“You know,” she says, her hands dropping to her sides as if all the energy has been drained out of her. “But invalidates everything you said before that.”
Before I have the chance to try and fix what has turned into a terrible night, she walks away. I stand in the living room wondering how we got here.
You know how you got here. You keep pushing and pushing. You don’t give her room to breathe. You become so focused on taking care of her that you refuse to let her be who she is.
I scowl as a door slams somewhere else in the house. For a moment, I consider going after her and trying to sort this out right now.
Instead, I send a message to one of the men guarding the house before gathering my keys, gun, and phone before heading out.
What I need right now is a walk in the cool night air to clear my head.
I nod to the men near the front door as I step outside. I shut and lock it before making my way to the street. The lights are shining bright against the night. I tilt my head back to look at the stars, though most of them are washed out by the light pollution in the city.
Staring at the sky in Miami isn’t the same as sitting at the cabin and showing Hadley the constellations.
Cars pass by as I head for the gates of the community. The security guard on duty looks at me and nods before returning to the magazine he’s reading. I stare at the little booth for a moment, wondering how a man with no formal training is going to take care of an entire gated community.
