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I was anxious to put them in my mouth where they belonged.
“I don’t like being ganged up on. Nobody is going to tell me how to live my life. I know you don’t know me very well but Bethany should know better. Tempting me with this delicious treat with many layers to peel away to get at the center of the creamy goodness is too much for any woman to take. I do want you back where you belong on your knees servicing me. I don’t mind playing around but sometimes that leads down a dangerous path of least resistance,” she mentioned once again trying to throw cold water on my parade.
“There is no guilt when it comes to pleasure. You already know what you are getting with me. We should do what comes naturally and get down to the business at hand. It doesn’t have to be any more than a good time,” I said in my attempt to convince her.
I wasn’t going to fall hopelessly in love with her. Then again, stranger things had happened in my life.
Taking it day by day was only encouraging my bad behavior. Those kisses were never going to be far away from my thoughts. That fire inside was being stirred to the surface every time that she touched me.
The pain was swimming upstream against the pleasure of being in her company. The injuries were healing slowly but I was willing to put in the work to put that smile on her face.
Tumbling down the ladder would have been enough to pull those stitches. It was a good thing that I didn’t take that step lightly.
“I think tonight we should stay away from one another. I know that’s not a popular opinion but I need time to think about what I want. Twenty-four hours is all that I’m asking for. I will give you credit for showing me what it’s like to live again. I’m not going to get into it. There was a bad apple. He was rotten to the core. He has made me hesitant to take a risk,” she voiced her concern and there was nothing left to say.
“I never want to make you feel uncomfortable. Pressing my buttons is causing me to act irrationally. I’m not usually this forthright. You could say you bring it out in me,” I said with a backward glance on my way to the stove to help Bethany with supper.
Constance took this opportunity to make herself scarce most likely to put on something a little more comfortable. I was envisioning something with garters and stockings to make my mouth water for the dessert.
All sorts of different types of lingerie came to mind.
“I’m going to give you some advice. It’s better to tread carefully. I was there when she was knocked down. I helped her to stand back up after the dust settled. To say that she was rattled by the experience would be a vast understatement. This is a story for her to tell you when she feels comfortable to do so. Don’t give up on her. She’s well worth the effort but I think you already know that,” Bethany explained without going into any great detail.
It was putting me on the defensive. Drama wasn’t what I signed up for.
“I think you can agree that I’m easy on the eyes. You certainly couldn’t take yours off of us when we were right here a few minutes ago. I’m not going to judge. Everybody has their own secret kink underneath the surface. Anybody that says they don’t is a damn liar. Lust has no reason. She’s probably expecting me to show my true colors but what you see is what you get,” I justified with a brief peek behind the curtain of my damaged psyche.
The past was behind me but it was always there lurking in the shadows waiting to jump out. Being in the military afforded me the opportunity of seeing the world but also the ugliness that people projected onto others. It made it important for me to grab onto those opportunities when they presented themselves.
“I don’t see anything wrong with you from where I’m standing. Why anybody can pass up on that feeling of complete bliss is beyond me. The only thing I advise is that you don’t give her a reason to cry over you. She might seem strong on the outside but inside, she is a fluttering mass of nerves,” she alerted me with her concern for her friend on her sleeve.
“I’m not sure how long I’m staying, but it would be fun to have something to look forward to at the end of the day. I’m working my proverbial ass off. I want to thank you for your insight. This is her game to play. It’s entirely up to her how she wants to proceed,” I said while putting the finishing touches on the fish until everything was ready.
She came down wearing purple sweats. There weren’t flattering to her body image. I believed that was on purpose to keep my thoughts from getting overheated.
“It looks like the two of you have been busy in my absence. Taking a cold shower was a good idea. I’ve given this a lot of extensive thought, and I’ve come to some painful conclusions. I wanted to believe that I was ready for a strictly physical relationship with you. I’m just not sure that it’s true. I might be trading one set of problems for another. Let’s table it for the time being,” Constance suggested.
We sat down at the table in the dining room with the open concept making it easy to watch the stove for any pot that was attempting to boil over. I did the honor of serving the food with a polite bow to make both girls giggle like schoolgirls. It was actually fun to get to know them.
Absolving my sins from past indiscretions shouldn’t come at their expense. It was wrong to try to force the issue with liquid words of persuasion. Constance was quite stubborn and in control of her emotions for the most part.
We finished by making chitchat about the weather and the renovations. They went into the kitchen, and I sat there a little frustrated. A good run would help burn off that excess energy running through my veins.
There was no reason to consult them.
Grabbing my coat and walking out the door made me breathe in the fresh air once outside. Running in place got my blood pumping. The road was practically deserted with a few errant joggers coming out during the twilight hours. Nothing was going to break my stride once I found a rhythm.
The idea was to keep moving steadily towards my goal. Checking my watch gave me a good impression of what distance I had made. It was nice to get back to the basics. There was a lake.
I decided to run around it by following a marked path.
Hitting that wall wasn’t uncommon. That stitch in my side was burning something fierce but I managed to run through the worst of the pain until I reached the safety of the other side. It was something I had been through in the past when I was training extensively in the military
It was also a throwback to a different era. The football was the only thing that mattered back in the day. I was a hero to many. Showboating was part of my mystique. Coming up with different dances when I made that touchdown had people on the edge of their seat waiting to see what I had come up with next.
Those days made me smile but there was one glaring instance that I would have liked to take back.
She was my lifeline. Julie had the intellect but I felt suffocated by the knowledge being imparted. It took a lot to get through my thick skull when I had only a few things on my mind during my adolescent years. It was unfair to use her for my own selfish needs. She gave me a chance to shine on the field when my grades were declining courtesy of too much partying and falling into the wrong crowd.
Julie was a necessary evil. She wouldn’t do my homework. That made me angry despite how she was going out of her way to help me.
The sun was barely much more than a brief speck beyond the trees. The lights came on to guide me back to the place that I called home for the time being.
I heard the sirens and they breezed past me while I was pumping my legs about to round the corner. It made me stop short to see the flames licking the sky through the kitchen window.
Paramedics were on the scene with the fire department trying to put out the blaze. My heart stopped when I saw Constance lying on the ground.
She was not moving. There were burns on her arms, and her lips were blue. I was in shock unable to comprehend that she was here one minute and gone the next.
