AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I reached the driveway before I broke down –
And I sobbed like a baby for 20 minutes before I could finally pull myself together and go inside.
153
Iasked to take a leave of absence for a full month, effective immediately.
Ordinarily, there would have been all sorts of hurdles getting it cleared – but I emailed Alistair and asked him if he could help.
Consider it done, he emailed back.
And lo and behold, it was approved.
That’s what having the Director of Operations on your side could accomplish.
I didn’t do much. Most days, I was too depressed to get out of bed before noon.
When I did get up, I usually started drinking and didn’t stop until I passed out at night.
I cried a lot. I would go for an hour or two not crying, and then suddenly I would think of Lars – or see something that reminded me of him – and burst into tears.
It was hell.
But I got through it.
Three weeks into my self-enforced isolation, Alistair texted me.
No news, but I wanted to check up on you. Get a coffee or tea with me?
I didn’t feel like I could deny him that – not after all he had done for me – so I agreed to meet him the next day.
I had to sober up first.
I dragged myself out of bed, showered for the first time in weeks, and put on some lipstick. That was about all the preparation I could bring myself to do.
I met Alistair at a coffee shop in Vauxhall at 10 AM.
“How are you holding up?” he asked me as we sipped our drinks.
“I can’t believe I got played for a fool.”
I hadn’t meant to say that. The honesty just slipped out.
“It’s not your fault,” he said quietly.
I gave a sharp, bitter laugh. “It was my fault.”
“No,” he said firmly. “He was a bastard, and bastards are good at keeping it hidden.”
As soon as he said it, anger ripped through me. I glared at him like I wanted to kill him.
How DARE you call Lars that!
“I’m sorry,” Alistair said, both apologetic and alarmed by my expression. “I shouldn’t have said that.”
Then I asked myself:
Why am I getting mad at HIM?
