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I returned his smile, and he brushed his thumb across the back of my knuckles. “Is this okay?”
“Holding hands? Very okay. More than okay. Perfect.” I felt as if I was babbling, flustered by the effect this man had on me. I was feeling things that I’d never felt for another human before. Deep things.
Lifting my hand, he placed a kiss to the back of it before he released me with a sigh. “We probably shouldn’t hold hands in public. The likelihood of anyone from campus seeing us is minimal, but it’s still a risk.” He was right, and that was why I didn’t protest. We were doing our best to be careful in the time we had left together. We’d agreed that we couldn’t risk anything else happening on campus, so I’d stopped visiting him in his office, and he’d stopped bringing me coffee—making up for it every time we met up away from LSU, hence the drink I currently clutched in my hand.
Steering us to the left, he lifted his takeaway coffee cup as if he could read my mind. “How’s your dessert in a cup?”
“Delicious. How’s your tedium in a cup?”
“Energising.”
“Oh, really?” Making my way over to the side of the pavement, with Killian right behind me, I came to a stop in the shadow of a tall building. Glancing around us to make sure we were alone, I said, “I think I need some energy.”
His brows rose, amusement in his gaze. “Is that so? In that case, I think I need some sweetness.”
We were both on the same page. When he angled his head, his lips brushing over mine, I sighed. Nothing could be better than this. This man, a sunny day, delicious coffee, and kisses that made my knees weak.
After the emotional roller coaster we’d been on, we both needed this.
“Hmm. Maybe you do have a point about the sweetness.” He licked across my bottom lip. “So good.” My lips parted, and his tongue slid against mine, our mouths moving together, slowly and deeply. I lost myself in the taste of him, the feel of his body against mine, the warmth of his palm in my hand.
“I could kiss you all day,” I murmured when he pulled back. With a smile, he placed a final kiss to the tip of my nose.
“That sounds like something we should definitely do.”
“Definitely.” We began walking again, crossing a bridge over Regent’s Canal and then down the steps to the canal towpath. Taking sips from my icy coffee, I took in the sights around us. Barges and small boats gently bobbed in the water, sending tiny ripples across the surface. The occasional cyclist passed us at a leisurely pace, and couples and small groups meandered along the path, some with dogs pulling at leashes, excited to explore. “This is so nice. Quiet. Relaxed. Away from the uni. I really like this, Kill.”
“Yeah? This isn’t too quiet for you?” Before I could reply, he shook his head. “I know. When I was first getting to know you, I thought…well, you have so many friends. You thrive in company, in social situations. But now I know you, and I know you need your downtime as well. It balances you.”
I stared at him in shock. “Yeah, it does. I hadn’t even realised that about myself. You…you know me so well.”
We stopped next to a barge that doubled as a small floating bookshop. His lashes swept down, hiding his expression as he turned his head, fixing his gaze on the water. “You know me, too, Joshua. You know things about me that I’ve never shared with anyone.”
My heart swelled. After another quick glance around to make sure no one was paying us any attention, I wrapped my arm around the back of his neck, pulling him close. I placed my mouth to his ear, pressing a soft kiss to his lobe. “Thank you for trusting me with your secrets.”
He didn’t reply, but he turned his head, kissing my cheek softly.
Since we were next to the floating bookshop, we decided to check it out, stooping to enter. Inside, it was warm and cosy, with dark wood and cushioned seating areas upholstered in faded fabric. Bookshelves lined the interior walls of the barge, and we spent a while browsing through the various books on offer.
Holding a hardcover clothbound copy of Lady Chatterley’s Lover, I wandered over to Killian. He was flipping through a book, but when I reached him, he sighed, placing it back on the shelf.
“Decided you didn’t want it?”
Glancing at the book in my hands, he cocked his head, and I answered his unspoken question.
“This is for G. It’s her favourite book. She likes to collect different editions, and I know she doesn’t have this one yet. So, what about the book you were just looking through?”
He shook his head. “I don’t…” Trailing off, he scrubbed his hand across his face, his expression pained.
Balancing my coffee cup on the book and praying I wouldn’t spill it, I placed my hand on his arm. “Kill. Tell me.”
“I never…I had few possessions growing up and never any money to spare for, you know, frivolities. I suppose I’m not really used to buying things for myself. Things I don’t need, at least.”
Oh, fuck. It took me a minute to gather my composure, and then, straightening my shoulders, I cleared my throat. Thankfully, my voice came out steady, giving no clue to the way he’d shattered my heart with his words. This man deserved the entire world, to not feel guilty about spending less than a tenner on a fucking book. “Give me the book.”
His gaze flew to mine, and I hardened my expression, letting him know I was serious. Eventually, he sighed, pulling the book from the shelf. He took my coffee and replaced it with his chosen book, One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez.
“Good. Okay. Now we’re going to go and pay for these. Or, more accurately, you’re going to pay for your own book, and I’ll pay for mine. You work hard for your money, Kill. You deserve to treat yourself.”
