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“Miss Hamilton?” Mr Toad Face butts into my thoughts with what is, without a doubt, another ridiculous request for me to do something mundane for him. “Can you please staple these documents together and bring them to my office?” See?
I curse this useless frog man in my head, taking the papers from him, and in a sickly-sweet voice, I reply, “Of course, Mr Franklin. I will do that right away.” I watch as he saunters back to his office, muttering obscenities under my breath, feeling more certain than ever that I have to get out of here. Grabbing the stapler with annoyance, I look at my phone as I get a text message from Amy.
Amy: So have you thought about what you are going to wear on Friday night?
With only three days before my impending date, I have no time to go out and buy a date-appropriate outfit and have been, in my mind, browsing through my wardrobe, hoping there is something cute and sexy in there that I can pull together.
Lilly: No! Not yet. Thoughts?
Amy: I’m looping in the gang.
There’s a pause before the next text.
Madi: Wear something short, to show off your legs!
Amy: And something that showcases your boobs! Oh, and your tiny waist!
Sammi sends a fire emoji.
From this description, it sounds like I won’t be wearing very much.
Amy: We will help you put together the perfect outfit.
Amy is very excited about my getting back out there. She squealed like a little piglet when I told her about it.
Amy: Want to borrow something of mine? Or we can go shopping? Please let me take you shopping!
Madi: Girls’ shopping trip?!
Sammi: I’m in!
Unlike me, my friends love shopping and dressing up, while I am happy to be in anything comfortable. And, as I have been advised by my know-it-all friends, diving back into the dating pool means dressing for comfort must now take a back seat.
Lilly: No time and no money for shopping. And, Ames, your clothes are always too tight around my bust and too long on my little legs.
Amy: The bust thing does not sound like an issue to me;).
Sammi: :)
Lilly: I think I will take it from here. Thanks, guys.
Amy: Send us pictures of your options and we can all decide.
Madi: Yes, loop us all in. We can take a vote. Majority rules.
Lilly: OK, will do. Got to go, boss man needs me to staple something for him :(.
Amy: You need a new job!
Sammi sends a GIF of a sad-looking puppy nodding.
Lilly: I’m working on it.
I sigh and put down my phone, getting back to the very important task of stapling documents. I love my life.
*****
Later that night, I stand in front of my wardrobe and sort through my options. Hmm, each one is too tight or too short or too comfortable. What was I thinking when I purchased half these things? This is going to be harder than I thought. Just when I think all is hopeless, I spy a red miniskirt in the back of my cupboard. Madi told me a miniskirt is the way to go. The skirt is a perfect shade of red, not too bright but just bold enough to make a statement. I pair it with an off-the-shoulder black top, both tight across the bust and loose enough to breathe in, and some sky-high heels I will need to practice wearing before Friday. The heels feel necessary given that Grant has said he is over six feet tall and I need to not feel like a hobbit next to him. Once I have it all on together, I take a picture of me wearing the outfit and send it to the girls for their approval.
