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“The wood is in the storage shed. I think you’re going to have to cut it to size, though. Think you can handle that, Mr. Not-so-handy-man?”
I ignore her and head out back.
About half an hour later, I’m on my knees in front of the porch with the mostly cut-to-size board and the original ripped off. My spot on the steps has given me an unfortunate eye-level view of Andi’s ass in those jeans all morning. She’s constantly going on tiptoes to reach up for things, just daring me to stare.
“What do you think?” Andi asks.
I glance up, trying to figure out what she’s asking about. I see a little string of candy cane lights framing the front door and two windows on either side.
She puts a fist on her hip, tilting her head as she studies her work. “Is it too much?”
My eyes fall to her ass again, and I force them back to the decorations. “It’s great. They’re great,” I say, clearing my throat.
She glances over her shoulder, smirking. “How long is that going to take you, anyway? No wonder you don’t charge your sister. You’re super slow. You also realize you cut that step kind of crooked, right?”
“Are you an expert on replacing steps?” I ask. “Maybe I’m doing this fast. How would you know? And I’d like to see you do better with a thirty-year-old hand saw that’s rusted to hell.”
“Somebody’s grumpy today. Is that why you’ve been giving me the silent treatment?”
“I haven’t,” I say. “I asked about your sweater.”
She laughs. “And then you’ve proceeded to stare at the ground and pretend I don’t exist ever since.”
Definitely not true. “I’m trying to respect your brother,” I say. “He’s right, anyway. I was way over the line with you yesterday.”
She scrunches her face up. “What?” she laughs. “You weren’t at all. You’ve been a total gentleman since you rescued me off the side of the mountain. You didn’t even look up my dress when you boosted me into the truck! And that was when we’d just met. I think five out of ten guys would’ve looked. Easy. And not because I’m some hot commodity, just because who isn’t going to be curious if I was actually commando under my wedding dress. Right?”
“I could have sent you into those clothing stores with my card and waited in the truck. And I should’ve asked you to get dressed before trying to show you how the bed vibrates.”
Andi folds her arms. She’s so damn pretty it hurts. It hurts, because I know I’m not even remotely ready to date again or enter into anything resembling a relationship. Even if I was, she’s my best friend and teammate’s little sister. I need to get that fact tattooed on the inside of my damn eyelids at this point. It feels like I need constant reminding.
“I wanted your advice on the dress,” she says. “And the bed thing was funny. It’s not like my boobs flopping wildly out of a towel in that kind of chaos is going to be sexy to anyone. Jake was overreacting. He always does.”
“Yeah,” I say, wondering how she thinks seeing her bare chest could’ve not been sexy in any context. “But, it’s about respect. Jake is my best friend. It’s disrespectful to give him any reason to worry about my intentions with his little sister.”
Andi rolls her eyes. “And what about the little sister? Does anyone worry about what is respectful or disrespectful to her? Like talking about her as if she’s some symbolic object instead of a living, breathing person who may have preferences of her own?”
Shit. I can see she’s right, but I’m also stuck between two impossible options. Dropping the cold and silent act with Andi is going to be a betrayal to my best friend. But it’s like she says. Acting as if Jake has the right to decide what’s best for Andi isn’t fair to her.
I hang my head and shake it. “I’m sorry, Andi. I don’t really know how to win here.”
She makes a frustrated noise and turns her back, pulling down the candy cane lights and tapping her chin, like she’s trying to figure out where to put them.
“What?” I ask.
She keeps her back to me for a few seconds. “I guess I thought maybe you’d be different than the other guys I’ve known. They run scared of me the moment Jake enters the picture. The only relationships I’ve ever had last more than a few weeks were the ones that started when he was too busy with hockey to screw them up in time. But I thought you were nice enough that you would at least still treat me like a person, even when he showed up. I’m just disappointed, but it’s alright. You don’t owe me anything.”
I open my mouth to say something but can’t seem to find the right words. I want to tell her that yeah, sure, if things were different I’d be interested in her. I haven’t enjoyed spending time with a woman like this in a long ass time. But I also don’t want to lead her on. I know I’m not ready to open up any time soon, and Andi would deserve that from me. All I’d be able to offer her is sex and something casual. She deserves way more than that, and she definitely doesn’t need to hear me explain it that way.
It feels like the only correct response is to stay silent.
Andi apparently disagrees, because she drops the candy canes a few seconds later and goes inside, closing the front door a little too hard.
I consider going after her, but know it wouldn’t do any good. Instead, I finish up the job and head back to the cabin for the day. I told Caroline I’d stick around until afternoon when the guys got back from practice, but I figure she has Andi now. And Andi will probably be relieved to find me gone when she goes back out, anyway.
11
ANDI
