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Chapter 15
Rachel
She was mid-hug with Jonathan when she saw him, purple lilacs in hand. The smile starting on her face instantly turned to confusion, however, as she watched the lilacs crumple to the floor. She didn’t understand what happened when he shoved the door open and flew out of the theater. Her body stiffened in reaction, fear creeping into her heart.
“What’s wrong, love?” Jonathan asked when she pulled out of his grasp, his gorgeous accent wrapping her in concern.
“I don’t know,” she replied honestly. She kissed him on the cheek. “I have to get going. See you tomorrow? And thanks again for those lozenges before the show. They were a lifesaver.”
“Anything for my favorite costar. Catch you tomorrow,” he said, winking.
Rachel willed her legs to carry her faster, wondering what he was doing. There must be some mistake, some emergency. Why would he act like this? She stepped over the lilacs now crinkled in an impromptu grave in the aisle as she headed to the street to find Zander.
On the street, seas of tourists floated about, and she realized finding him would be an impossible task. She glanced left and right, panic rising as she wondered what could’ve possibly happened.
And then, to her left, she saw him, furiously pacing near the corner of the building.
Confusion still building, she walked over. “Zander?” she asked.
At the sound of his name, he turned. She could see anger in his eyes, and, as she got closer, in the way he tensed his jaw. She hadn’t seen him like this, and to be honest, it scared her quite a bit. What was going on?
Her mind raced to the worst.
“Zander, what’s wrong?” Crowds of people parted around them, the noise of the city echoing about as she closed the gap between them.
He stood, silent, hands in his pockets.
“You tell me.” His words were cold and harsh, closing in around Rachel.
“What are you talking about?”
“I saw you with that guy on stage,” he calmly replied, taking deep breaths as if to calm himself.
Rachel searched her mind. “Jonathan?”
Zander stared. “I saw you two. I saw the way you looked at him and the way you hugged him. I saw what was going on, Rachel. Look, I know we haven’t defined this thing between us. But you could’ve told me if you were attached to someone else. You didn’t have to play with my heart like this, okay?”
Rachel blinked, still not sure if she was following him, but doing her best to try. “Wait, you think… Jonathan? Zander, he’s just a friend. We’ve been in the same roles together for a couple of years now. It was nothing. I was just thanking him for some throat lozenges he gave me because my throat hurt. That was what ticked you off?”
Rachel studied Zander, feeling for the first time like she had no idea who she was looking at. The kind, empathetic, humorous guy was replaced with some shell of himself, a hardly recognized, angry version of the man she was falling for. His jealousy was palpable in the evening air, and to be honest, it scared Rachel.
What was going on with him?
Zander studied her, trying to catch her in her lie. “Really? There’s nothing there?”
“No, Zander. There’s not.” Her words were in a cold tone matching his. She hated the tension between them. What was going on? And why was he acting like this? Things still didn’t make sense. She had never seen him behave this way.
Zander sighed, pacing, some of the anger detectably dissipating.
“I’m sorry,” he murmured, still staring at the wall of the theater. After a long moment, he took another breath, turned to Rachel, and repeated himself. “I’m sorry, Rachel. I’m an idiot.”
She bridged the gap between them, putting a hand on his arm. “It’s fine, I think. But what happened back there?”
There was a long moment before he responded. “It wasn’t you or what happened back there. It was what happened years ago with a woman I don’t even know anymore. I’m sorry. It’s just, seeing you like that, it triggered old fears. I’m not proud of that. I’m not proud to admit I’m still messed up from something that happened so long ago.”
Rachel sensed something familiar in him now—terror. It was something she was no stranger to, and she knew what it was like to be burned by love and to still be afraid of love. She was dealing with that herself.
“Tell me about it.” It was a simple invitation, but it was all he needed. Standing on the sidewalk in the middle of the city, he looked into her eyes and everyone else melted away as he told his story.
