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“That photo is the best.”
“Rothy’s very photogenic,” I said.
“Rothy?” Elliott asked as the woman wandered off.
“Hrothgar is too much of a mouthful.”
“Shame.” Elliott shrugged and looked over my shoulder toward the SF Bay and Alcatraz, which took me aback until I replayed what I’d said in my head and started laughing.
“I have no problem with that kind of mouthful,” I said and nearly melted on the spot when Elliott glanced back at me with a smoldering look. “But Hrothgar and Beowulf? Nope. They are Rothy and Bey to me. Isn’t that right, Rothy?” I held up a small piece of steak from my sandwich, and the big dog let out a booming bark. “Is it okay if I give this to him?” I asked, realizing belatedly that Elliott might not appreciate his dogs getting human food.
“By all means. At this point, he’d probably smother me in my sleep if I said no.”
Despite his size, Rothy took the morsel quite gently. I was impressed. It was clear Elliott had done a lot of work with him.
“None for you, little man,” I said to Bey. “You’re too little for big-boy treats.” I scooped him up in my arms and cuddled the heck out of him, though, to make up for it.
Once we were done eating, we gathered up our trash and headed up the hill toward the Arguello Gate to see the Andy Goldsworthy installation, Spire. Despite working in the neighborhood, I’d never seen it, something Elliott had decided we needed to rectify, especially since we could then take the nature trail back toward the parade grounds parking lot.
“You had to have seen it. It’s just past the golf club.” Elliott insisted as he handed me Rothy’s leash. He’d put Bey in the wagon since the puppy was still too young to do that much walking. Even though Bey was only three months old, he still weighed close to thirty pounds, but Elliott pulled him up the hill without any problems, those arm muscles flexing, be still my heart.
“I know. My ex lives in the neighborhood too, and he never mentioned it despite knowing how much I love Goldsworthy’s work.” The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them. Shit. Rule number one on a first date was never talk about your ex, especially when said ex had earned that status less than a week ago.
“How long has he been an ex?” Elliott asked.
He didn’t look at me, and I could tell he was trying to be nonchalant about it, which made me want to kick myself. The answer wasn’t going to make him happy, but I refused to lie to someone with whom all signs were pointing toward at least a second date—if not more from the way Elliott was suddenly guarded. I decided to go for broke and see where the chips landed.
“About four days.”
“Oh.”
For the first time since I’d walked up to him earlier, we both fell silent, and, you know, that’s not something I was okay with, so I told him about Paul, about finding him with my best friend the night before I saw Hrothgar—and I even used his full name, thrilled when I saw the corners of Elliott’s mouth twitch upward—and how thrilled I was when Elliott DM’d me.
“I’ve never thought of love as a fixed commodity,” I said. “Or that loving one person precluded falling in love with someone else. Yes, I still have feelings for Paul, and those feelings have been badly betrayed, but that doesn’t mean I’m incapable of having feelings for someone else.”
“I don’t know,” Elliott said slowly.
I scratched Rothy’s head. He was so big, he was the perfect height for me to do that without leaning down. “It’s like you having these two. Do you love Hrothgar any less since you got Beowulf?”
“Not at all.”
“Because love is infinite.” I shrugged. “I guess I’m more dog loyal than cat loyal.”
Elliott cocked an eyebrow at me. “Does that mean you don’t like cats?”
I bumped my shoulder against him, silently thrilling when he bumped me back. “No. It means I’m loyal to each person on their own terms, the way dogs can have a different relationship with every person in their house. Cats are more loyal to the house, meaning the institution like love or relationships, and they don’t really care who feeds them as long as they get food.
“I don’t think we can get everything we need from one relationship anyway. We all have relationships with friends, coworkers, people at bakeries—all those give us things that our primary relationship doesn’t, and we never question those relationships as taking anything away from it. Even when we have a BFF, we don’t question if the love we feel for our friend takes anything away from the love we feel for our partner. So that’s what I mean by being dog loyal. Dogs can have a single person who’s the center of their world and still love everyone else.”
We were stopped by a group of teenage girls who squeed over the dogs. Once they were done loving on Rothy and Bey, we started walking, and I nodded to the puppy in the wagon. “Case in point. When they’re affectionate with other people, does it mean they adore you any less?”
“I suppose not.” Elliott seemed to ponder my question. “Though my ex had a cat who made the rounds to six different houses. It turned out they all thought the cat belonged to them.”
“Sometimes they’ll nearly shiv someone who gets between them and their person, but they’ll also let other people think they own it.” I was thinking about Orlando’s cat, Diamond, who’d been “taken in” as a stray by a new neighbor and then nearly destroyed their house because Diamond was a vindictive little shit. Huh. Come to think of it, that pretty much summed up Orlando’s personality too, even as a best friend. I’d just been trying to calm Elliott’s fears that I was still hung up on Paul, but doing a blog post about dog loyal vs cat loyal seemed like a good idea because I was more brilliant than I thought. Though…
“Ex, huh?” I asked. “How long?”
“Six months. I contacted Hrothgar’s breeder right after James left to find a puppy.”
