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"WHA-A-AT?!? He didn't! What did you say?"
"I can't remember, but something like what I was feeling was heading toward love."
"WHA-A-A-AT? Calla! What is wrong with you? I know you love him!"
"You do?" Now it was my turn to be wide-eyed.
"Yeah. I do. You've never looked at someone the way you look at him before. No one has ever looked at you the way Dom looks at you before. You enjoy spending time with him. I think you must have sizzling hot sex because, well, look at the both of you! Oh my god, you could sell your sex tape for millions, I bet!" We both laughed.
"Well, I don't think that's happening anytime soon, but thanks, I think?"
"What did Dom say when you said you think you're heading toward love?"
"I must admit, he didn't look that happy."
"Yeah, I wouldn't be either. I would be thinking, 'What the hell do I have to do or be or say to make this girl happy?' Honestly, Calla, what if he breaks up with you because you're not open enough?"
"He has mentioned it. Not breaking up, but he wishes I was more open. He wants to get to know the real me."
"And…? What's stopping you? Oh, and do you want some bubbly water? I opened a big bottle."
I got a glass out of the cupboard and held it out for her to fill. "Nothing is stopping me. I just don't know how to be open, maybe. I think I'm just being me, but it doesn't seem to be enough."
"Well, if you ask me, you are pretty closed. I mean, you don't share your feelings about things unless I ask you directly. Even then, sometimes I have to ask you a few times. At some point, maybe he will stop asking if you keep clamming up."
I recalled some past discussions with Dominic that made me think he was losing patience with me.
"But what can I do?"
"You can talk about your feelings more."
"But maybe I just don't have them as much as other people. I mean, Dominic is the most analytical person I know, so why is he so intent on getting me to be deep with him?"
Cassie looked at me like I was an alien. She sighed. "Because it's the whipped cream on the hot chocolate, it's the sprinkles on the donut, it's that color in the sky at dusk. He wants you and he wants all the feels that he feels with you shared by you. Can't you see that?"
Wow. That was a lot of "you"s. But I got it. She was so right. I sucked at being open. I sucked at allowing myself to feel. It was clear.
Cassie stood up and gave me a side hug. "I'd love to wax poetic for longer, but I have to go. And depending on how great the clubs are, I might not be home tonight! Don't wait up for me!"
I laughed. Here I was, having a free night and staying home. Talk about being responsible. "Have a great time, Cass."
Right. Time to get scrubbing the stove. For some reason, it felt like the perfect thing to do right about now.
Chapter 27
Dominic
Vic
Vic
Bro
Do you have time to do a contract job?
What are you thinking?
I'm leaving in a few weeks. Heading to Somalia to do foundation work. I'd like to get you involved in a marketing project with Calla. Do you have time? Would be about 1 hour every day just making sure she's headed in the right direction.
