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Freddie’s mouth formed a perfect ‘o’ of surprise. “You seem terribly relaxed.”
And there was the thing. Despite an itchy suit and feeling like a fly on a wedding cake surrounded by all these toffs, my inner soul was surprisingly peaceful. Tranquil even. Because Evan had painted a picture of how it was going to be—holidays, dinners, evenings with shared friends, holding hands on meandering strolls through the estate. Waking up next to each other every morning. Wandering around the supermarket together, doing the weekly shop. Family Christmases where Uncle Rob didn’t lie alone in the spare room staring at the ceiling, but cuddled up to his man, just as my sister slept cuddled up to hers.
“Because I am terribly relaxed,” I answered calmly. “It’s the right time.”
Another quick glance at my watch. Not particularly anxiously because Evan never let anyone down.
By now, Toby had wandered over to say hello. I thought of all the occasions I’d never acknowledged him in public, sometimes merely hours after he’d sunk to his knees to suck my knob after backing him up against the truck or behind a tree in some shady corner of the estate. No wonder he met my eye hesitantly, his boyfriend loitering a few feet away. Even after our chat, he was still half expecting the brush-off. Unsure of the correct way to greet a former lover, I settled for a friendly pat of his shoulder. Seemed it was the right choice, because Noah sidled over too. And before I knew it, Reuben, Freddie’s husband, had also joined us, chattering away at ten to the dozen in his delightful French accent, as if I was one of his oldest friends.
And another five minutes passed by.
“He’s not here yet,” murmured Freddie in my ear. “We’ll be calling everyone into dinner soon. How the hell are you so calm? I’m having kittens on your behalf.”
Jaw-droppingly stunning in emerald silk and pearls, Lucien Avery, sixteenth earl, glided over to join us, with Jay, his husband, at his elbow. “Rob, darling, how lovely to see you.”
“Spruces up very nicely, doesn’t he?” Freddie observed, giving my lapel a stroke.
“Gosh, yes.” Lucien's pale blue eyes glittered with amusement. “I can only assume it means one thing. And I’m thrilled the both of you have found each other at last. I think you are perfectly suited.”
For the second time in my life, I blushed. Freddie had always sworn that a sparrow couldn’t lay an egg at Rossingley without Lucien Avery getting wind of it; this entirely proved his point.
“Do send my regards to dear old Bill, won’t you, darling?” Lucien continued smoothly. “I always enjoy our cups of tea together.”
When Evan arrived, the air quality changed, for me anyhow. It felt cleaner, sharper, like the lifting of the early morning haze over my pastures, or as if the drawing room windows had been flung wide. The twinkling chandeliers above our heads brightened, as though evening had shifted into reverse gear and taken us back to the middle of the day. Chinking glasses fell silent and the crackling hum of overbred laughter faded into the background.
A movement at the door was followed by an exchange of coats and greetings with one of the staff, a brief dimming of chatter as heads turned to see the evening’s final guest arrive before turning back to their conversations.
“Damn, I was hoping that was him,” said Freddie’s voice at my side. “It’s only Jay’s nice friend, Evan. Are you sure he’s coming, Rob?”
“I’ve never been surer of anything in my life.”
My man looked damn fine in a tux. Not glitteringly flamboyant like Lucien, effortlessly flowing between genders. And thank Christ for that because the world wasn’t big enough for two. Evan wasn’t like his old friend Jay either, dressed in a suit precision-moulded to the rippling body underneath. Nor was he a lean, sinewy panther like Freddie, stalked by every single woman in the room and probably a few of the men too. But how could he be? No one pulled off vintage Valentino like my old pal Freddie. And, if I was really splitting hairs, Evan also couldn’t boast the sexy prettiness of Reuben, or the shy cuteness of Toby, or the darkly brooding allure of Toby’s boyfriend, Noah.
In all honesty, amongst this terribly sophisticated crowd, Evan would struggle to turn anyone’s head except mine. So he slipped under the radar; handsome, self-possessed, confident, fucking hot as hell in bed, and all mine.
Immediately approaching our group, he clapped his oldest mate on the back, his eyes imbued with warmth. “Jay, sorry for my tardiness, held up at work with the theatre list bloody overrunning. You know how it is.”
He turned to Lucien, slightly more formally, possibly a little warily. The earl tended to have that effect on people. “Gosh, darling, no need to apologise,” replied Lucien in a brisk manner. “We’re thrilled to have you here.” With one elegant hand on Evan’s shoulder, he leaned across to deliver a cheek kiss, the other hand tightly squeezed in Jay’s. A chink of vulnerability I imagined most people missed. Evan had mentioned the earl discombobulated him; seemed the feeling was mutual.
“Freddie, good to see you again.” Evan and Freddie shook hands warmly, Evan’s voice returning to his usual measured, deliberate tone. Like me, so sure of the rightness of us, he portrayed not a shred of nerves. He continued going round the group, turning to his left. “Hi, Toby, nice to see you again, too.”
The only person left in the group was me. Until Evan, I would have felt like an outsider amongst the Rossingley crowd, but tonight, admiring my lover, I sensed I’d found my tribe. I belonged.
Freddie put a hand on Evan’s arm. “Evan, let me introduce you to my old pal Rob. He has the dairy farm over on the north of the estate. Rob, this is Evan, one of Jay’s friends from way back when.”
A pair of green eyes twinkled at me. It had only been around twelve hours since they’d last done that, but long enough to miss them. I didn’t get much of a read on him, enough for his raised eyebrows to ask me the question and for my smallest of nods to answer. Yes, it was happening. After fifteen long years, it was time. And who better to step out of the shadows with than a group of folks who all knew I was bloody gay anyhow?
I put out my hand. Instead of shaking it, Evan bridged the gap between us. All of a sudden, for the briefest of seconds, he pulled me close, and his glorious soft lips landed on mine. “Sorry, babe, that tricky operation I told you about this morning dragged on a bit. All worked out well in the end though, but god, I’m ready for a drink.” He stepped back a pace. “Anyone need a top-up?”
Freddie Avery wasn't often lost for words. Toby either, I expected. Jay wore the bewildered expression of a man rudely shaken awake after a long afternoon nap, who couldn’t work out where the fuck he was. Open-mouthed, he stared at his oldest mate as if he’d never seen him before in his life.
“I’m…um…getting the impression you hadn’t yet told them,” murmured Evan, accepting a couple of champagne flutes from a hovering waiter. He handed one to me with a sly wink. “I’m quite enjoying this party already. Who do we tell next?”
Lucien wrapped a slim, silk covered arm around my shoulders. “Rob, darling,” he said in his fey, fluttery voice, “one doesn’t wish to pry, but does this finally mean you have gone public, and I can add you and Evan to my list of friends of the lavender persuasion?”
A deep booming gong announcing dinner interrupted us, but everyone was still waiting for an answer. Thinking of a response, I remembered something. As I’d climbed into my truck to drive the short journey here, a familiar skein of geese flew over. I paused, keys in hand to watch; they were always such a beautiful sight.
Tonight, however, the perfect ‘V’ had been lopsided; one goose flew slightly apart from the others, flapping his wings hard, as if trying to catch up. Shading my eyes with my hand, I’d tracked them across the cloudless sky until, with them almost out of sight, the straggler tagged onto the end of the group. By the time they’d disappeared, he’d blended in entirely.
