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“Bridget, obviously,” he grunts. “Fucking stepsisters…”
“Well, Nate slept with her too. So, there don’t need to be any hard feelings.”
The line is silent for a minute. A long one.
I start to remove the phone from my ear to see if that call dropped until Seth whispers, “What?!”
“You heard me.”
“Youbothslept with her?!”
“Yes.”
“What thefuck?!”
I chew on my lower lip.
Yeah, when he puts it like that, it sounds weird. “It’s not as weird as it sounds, bro.”
“Not as weird?! Look, I know it’s not abnormal to have crossover in a friend group but screwing the same girl in the same week?! That’s gotta be a record.”
I won’t tell him it was the same day, then. “Careful how you talk about her, alright?!”
Seth groaned, “Are you going to make me fuck her too?”
“What?! Don’t you even dare thinking about her!”
“Easy, there, killer. I was joking.”
I sip my coffee to keep me from saying something I might regret.
“I’d hate to have been Nate, then. You must have torn his head off when you found out if you almost reached through the phone and nearly strangled me for bringing it up.”
The sip of coffee curdles in my stomach. “That’s the thing, Seth.”
My friend pauses. “What do you mean?”
“I mean…” I trail off, putting my coffee down on the deck railing and gripping it.
I need to stay grounded. Need to try and remain levelheaded. Because this situation is anythingbutlevelheaded. “I’m not mad that he did.”
“You’re a bigger person than I thought, Lotts.”
“No, no. Seth, listen to me.” I chew on my lower lip for a moment.
I’m going to do it. I’m going to say to Seth what’s been brewing in my brain for weeks now. “It’s not that I’m a big person, it’s not that I can ‘get over it’. It’s that Ilikethat Nate is sleeping with her. Ilikehow he treats her. Do you get what I’m saying?”
“Uhhh…no, not really?”
I slam my hand on the deck railing. “Goddammit, Seth. I’m feeling all screwed up.”
“Just tell me more. Give me more details.”
My voice tightens in my throat.
I lower my head. “I’m not jealous of Nate and Laney anymore. I’m not upset over him having her. Because I have her too. And when I don’t have her, he’s taking care of her. And somehow that’s better because I fucked it all up the first time, so maybe if I have someone there helping me not fuck it up, then…”
Seth is silent.
