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My shock at her revelation disappeared and I leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees and putting my face in my hands.
“I didn’t mean to upset him,'' I said, my voice muffled.
“Hey,” Lily leaned forward and put her hand on my arm. “I didn’t mean to upset you. Are you ok?”
"Fine," I lied.
"Doesn’t look like it. Is it because of Theo? I don’t think he was completely devastated, you know, just a bit confused," she ventured.
“I know the feeling,” I muttered. “Look, it’s fine. I just need a shower, and sleep.”
“You do,” she agreed. “But right now, you also need a friend to talk to. And you can talk to me, Sari.”
I looked up at her, fixing her with a puzzled gaze. "Why? Why would you care?"
She crossed her arms, one eyebrow arching. "Because it’s nice to have another female around here to talk to without the heavy weight of testosterone, and because, winged wonder, you look like you've just arm-wrestled a djinn and lost. Spill it."
"Talk?" I echoed, the concept alien to me. "Angels do not—"
"Indulge in heart-to-hearts over a boy?" Lily smirked. "First time for everything, Sariel, and we already established it’s a day for firsts for you. Come on, it’ll make you feel better, and I promise, whatever you say, it stays between these canvas walls."
My brow furrowed, suspicion threading through my confusion. "I don’t understand though, why would you offer such kindness? You do realise, I am an angel. There will be no... carnal gratification for your troubles."
Lily burst out laughing. "Sariel, please, your angelic prejudice is showing. I might be a sex demon, but strangely enough, not everything is about getting into someone's pants." She took my hand and squeezed. "I'm offering because sometimes, being heard is all we need. You look upset and I like you. As a friend. We can just be friends, you know."
Friends? I tilted my head, considering the notion. Could angels have friends? Friendship wasn't a topic discussed much in Heaven. We had colleagues, warriors at arms, but not friends. When i thought about it, i couldn’t think of anywhere it was written that we couldn’t have friends though, and I had to admit, the idea appealed to me more than I thought it might.
"Friends," I repeated slowly.
"Yep, friends," she said. "Unless, of course, you're worried I might tarnish your halo with my worldly ways?" She raised one eyebrow and I grinned. She reminded me a little of Theo with jests and jabs that danced around the heart of the matter, that could be insulting but were meant fondly. Was this how humans and demons interacted? I found myself oddly drawn to it.
"My halo is quite resilient, thank you. Though I’m probably doing enough myself right now to tarnish it. And I think, yes. I would like to be friends. Though I’m not really sure how."
Lily grinned. “I’m honoured. And right now, you don’t need to do anything, just tell me what’s got you so wound up? You’rewearing tracks in the tent floor, and I personally like the solid separation between us and the lethal wildlife of this place.”
I glanced at the floor for a second, before I realised she was teasing me again.
I looked down at my hands. "It's complicated," I began, unsure how to articulate my feelings. it wasn’t something I was practised at. "Theo kissed me."
Lily rolled her eyes. “I think we established that part. He kissed you. And?”
I glanced away, feeling the heat rise to my cheeks. "I don't know what to do now. It wasn't supposed to happen."
"Did you want him to kiss you?" she asked.
My heart skipped a beat. "I wasn't sure... it just happened. I didn't expect it, and—"
"Come on, out with it," Lily urged, sensing there was more.
I bit my lip, then confessed in a rush, "It was my first kiss."
“With Theo?”
I looked up at her. “No, my first kiss with anyone.”
Lily's mouth dropped open, her eyes round with astonishment. "Your first kiss?" she echoed. "Ever?"
"Ever," I confirmed.
