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She always forced me to cover my body as if I should be ashamed of it. Yet another reason I had to reclaim it in such a big way. For the first time in literally my entire life, I felt like I was my own person.
Yes, I was insane, but I felt like me.
That was huge.
“So, what about Hiro?” she asked. “Roman?”
My eyebrows raised to my hairline at that.
“What about them?” I asked. Heat was creeping into my cheeks, a dead giveaway that I wasn’t as oblivious as I was pretending right now.
Layne rolled her eyes. “Don’t make me flash you again, Harlow. I’m not stupid. Do you think Hiro holds my hand? Do you think Roman has ever come out for anyone but Hiro? No.”
“This is the problem. They’re all so fucking different. I want them all,” I admitted. “We’re all mates but we haven’t said a word about what that means.”
“Didn’t you just tell me fuck society? Claim your men, Harlow, just not mine,” Layne suggested with a shrug like she didn’t put in a quick warning.
I couldn’t argue with her point, though. The only one holding me back from taking what I wanted was me.
I’d already reclaimed my body, now I just had to allow myself to live my fucking life.
It was hard to let go of all those years of being forced into a tiny box, not allowed to do a single thing properly.
Fuck my past, though, I couldn’t let it ruin my future.
Layne shouldn’t either.
“Go get your man, too, then,” I challenged. “Or are you afraid of some feelings, Layne? You know just because you pretend they aren’t real, doesn’t make them go away.”
“You’re my friend, not a therapist,” Layne grumbled as she pulled on the last of her clothes. I didn’t bother saying anything else because the last thing we needed was to fight right now.
Layne was teetering on the precipice of different emotions, and I didn’t want her sent away for a few days on my account.
By the time I’d gotten dressed and we threw our towels in the laundry room, Layne was already out of sight.
The rest of the floor was quiet again when I came out. It was a Thursday just before dinner so it wasn’t all that surprising. Everyone kind of disappeared to recharge after school and sessions that felt redundant and useless. If it was a hard session, this place was like a ghost town.
“Harlow.” My name being called had me freezing. The voice was low and echoing, like a distant whisper.
Glancing around, I expected shadows, a figure, anything. After the ups and downs of my conversation with Layne, it wouldn’t surprise me, but there was nothing there but dingy walls and dusty art, the worn furniture of the common room, and the distant sound of the nurses’ station as Nurse Drew hid in the back room again.
“Who’s there?” I called back, my voice quiet so I didn’t draw attention.
“What’s going on?” The sound of Roman’s voice had me jumping, and I spun around in time to see the elevator close behind him.
“Something’s calling me,” I admitted without thinking.
At this point a strange feeling filled my gut, like I was being yanked upward.
“Harlow,” he demanded, and I turned to him to find his gaze focused on me. “There’s nothing here. I don’t hear it.”
“Harlow.” Again the drawn-out call happened, and my feet were moving before I could stop them. Roman slid into the elevator beside me and raised his eyebrows when I hit the sixth floor. I had a feeling sneaking around wouldn’t be as easy, and I frantically tried to think of something, ignoring the random questions from Roman as I did.
The moment the elevator opened, I started to step off but was yanked back. I looked toward Roman’s face but I wasn’t focused on him, the need to get to the roof was so strong now that I couldn’t think of anything else.
In the back of my mind, I knew something wasn’t right, that this wasn’t normal, but I couldn’t do anything to stop it.
“You can’t be up here,” a nurse said as she rushed forward, pulling a phone from her pocket.
