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Shutting off my computer, I went to the living area instead and turned on the TV, needing something to distract my mind. I had more than a full day to wait to find out if she'd given up on me or not. Not that there was an ‘us’ to give up on. But fuck, it sure felt like there was, and that we’d just suffered our first argument and first breakup all at once.
My skin itched to go to her, but I forced myself to be still.
I couldn’t have her.
Could I?
Chapter 13
-Mia-
I spent hours and hours agonizing over the question of whether I was done working with Owen or not. While I was struggling to forgive his assholery, I couldn’t imagine a day without him. Sunday was excruciating enough, and that wasn’t just because of the radio silence between us, or the fact that I'd had to lie to Clea about everything.
What I eventually came to decide was, I needed to see him, to see if maybe he’d figured out his brain enough to realize he’d made a massive mistake.
Well, that wasn’t the only reason. Part of my brain, the realistic and logical side, still knew that my TA job would help prepare me for my hopeful writing career. Asshole or not, he was a professional and I still had so much that I could learn from him. If we could keep it in our pants, anyway.
At five after one, I knocked on his door a moment before entering.
Surprise registered over his face, then it leveled out.
“You’re late,” he said, that twinkle back in his eyes when he teased me. “You know how I feel about being late.”
“When you’re on time for class for once, you can berate me,” I countered, then sat on my chair across from him.
It was silent for a long moment, until he said, “I’m glad you came back, Mia.”
I nodded, but didn’t look up. Instead, I grabbed the top of the small stack we had left from Saturday when we’d…gotten distracted.
Owen pinched the bridge of his nose, a frustrated action. He didn’t say anything else, though it was obvious he wanted to by the way he kept opening his mouth, then shutting it with a quiet snap.
Well, evidently there was a plan C, which was 'pretend nothing ever happened and get really freaking awkward'.
Awesome.
We went on for two hours that way before Owen sat back and grabbed his hair, letting out a frustrated growl.
“What is it now?” I asked him.
He shook his head.
“Isn’t it enough to sit in this awkward as heck silence, you have to add your own frustrations to it for me to endure?”
He chuckled, though there was no humor in it.
“Fuck awkward. This is torturous,” he finally admitted.
“Do I need to resign?” I asked in a quiet voice.
I didn't want to, but I was starting to wonder if I even had a choice at this point.
“No, we can be grown ups about this,” he said, shaking his head while he fussed with some papers on his desk for no reason.
“There’s been no point in this where we’ve acted grown up since the moment you pulled out of me Sunday morning,” I told him.
His head shot up and he met my eyes, that familiar hunger dangling before me, so close, but so inaccessible.
“I’m trying to do the right thing, Mia,” he growled. “I’m doing the hard part for both of us.”
