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Now that I was talking, all the things I had thought about over the years came pouring out. “I had thought once we settled down, we would figure it all out and, in the beginning, it seemed like we had. But I think she just liked the glamor of being pregnant, the attention maybe, but after, I don't know if it was postpartum depression or what, but she was different.”
Memories of Natasha being distant and ignoring Hailey’s toddler pleas for attention surfaced and pained me all over again. “And then one day out of the blue when Hailey was two, she left. A while later, she served me with divorce papers, and we were done. We haven’t spoken since. I used to send her photos of Hailey, but after years of silence, I gave up."
"I'm sorry, Jake. That must have been hard."
"It was, but we made it through. It's in the past and it's not something I want to dwell on."
She smiled, and I felt some of the weight lift from my chest. "Fair enough. Thank you for telling me. I realize that can't be easy."
"Thank you for listening."
We laid there for a while, basking in the flickering candlelight, the silence comfortable, and eventually, Molly spoke again. "I think you need a vacation. Like something just for you. You should go away for the weekend, and I'll stay with Hailey. Go out, do manly things, whatever that is for you."
I laughed, the thought of a weekend to myself was as appealing as it was uncomfortable. "Maybe. We'll see."
"Don't be stubborn. You deserve a break and maybe Hailey needs a break from you too. We'll have girl time like we talked about at dinner. She’ll love it."
"I'm not being stubborn. I'll think about it."
"Fine." She pouted and I kissed her.
"Thank you."
But Molly had made up her mind about it, and if there was anything I knew about Molly, it was that when she made up her mind, she didn't relent. The week drifted by and Molly all but packed my bags for me.
"Hailey, I'm leaving."
"Bye, have fun." She didn't seem like she was going to miss me at all.
"Love you, Hails."
"Love you too."
I stood there for a moment, a twinge of anxiety tugging at the edges of my mind. Or was it guilt? It's not like I hadn't been away from Hailey, but it was never me leaving. It was her going over to a friend’s house or summer camp. Never dad going fishing with his high school buddy. It felt weird but I thought it was good, for both of us.
"Call me if you need anything."
"Dad, I'll be fine. Molly will be here, and we'll have a good time."
"If you're sure."
"I am."
"Okay, I love you. Bye."
I gave a half wave as I got into the car. The drive was long, but I enjoyed the scenery. My pulse quickened seeing the "Lakefront Getaway" sign at the end of the winding gravel drive, my buddy Dan's battered wood-paneled station wagon parked ahead. After nonstop demands devouring life lately, anticipating two days doing nothing beyond reviving a decades-old friendship stirred unfamiliar excitement inside me alongside a gratitude for Molly.
Dan whooped, stepping out on to the porch of the sprawling log cabin nestled privately on a glassy lake, the late afternoon sunlight winking invitingly off cerulean blue waters. Soon we were cracking cold ones, chairs dug into the rocky shore, catching up.
I nearly spewed my beer listening to Dan's disastrous online dating mishaps that rivaled even my recent reputation-shredding debacles.
"Enough about my pathetic attempts at meeting women," Dan said, chuckling. I grimaced, knowing where this was going. "What about you? How is your love life? I hear it’s no longer dormant."
I laughed. "It's complicated."
"That's code for a lot is going on, but you don't want to talk about it."
I sighed, taking a long sip of my drink. "I've got a girlfriend. It’s new and stuff."
