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I feel him looking at me in my periphery. “Let’s not go there.”
“Just meant the shit we got up to. We should’ve come with warning signs.”
He shakes his head. “Pretty sure it was a given.”
“Do you forgive her?” I don’t know why I blurt that out. Maybe my overnight stint in jail has made me soft in the head.
“Who?”
I roll my eyes. “Our mother.”
He grips the steering wheel hard. “Do you?”
I don’t even hesitate. “No.”
Another long silence.
“I think she was too stoned to do her job as a parent,” he says eventually. “That’s what I tell myself, anyway. If she would’ve been sober, she would never have let…” He trails off, and I continue to stare out of the window.
Jett told me he had therapy one time, but me? I just hit it out in the ring and hope for the best.
I have anger issues, but at least I can admit to it.
“I think there’s a special place in hell for people like her.” We never mention him.
I thought about looking for him on more than one occasion, but we had nothing to go on. We were fuckin’ children. We didn’t know then that our mother got paid to be a whore. That even men in designer suits would visit and then leave. Sometimes she was beaten, other times just used. We were too young to know what was going on.
The one thing I’ve never understood is how someone can sell their body for money. I’d like to say I don’t judge, and each to their own and all of that shit, but I’d be lying my ass off if I truly believed it. As low as I’ve ever been in my life, my dignity is not for sale. I’ve also never paid a whore.
Pity my mom was for sale and she preferred dick so she could keep sticking needles in her arm instead of feeding her children.
Rummaging in a dumpster isn’t just one of the memories I’ve tried hard to break, it’s the tip of the iceberg.
“I think that’s one thing we can agree on,” Jett says, his voice low.
I give him a chin lift, wanting to change the conversation. “So, have you been promoted yet?”
He rubs a hand over his chin, his lips curling up slightly. “I’m Treasurer now.”
“What does that mean?”
“I look after the books. Now the club has acquired more businesses, it won’t be long before they need a good accountant.”
“You goin’ back to school?” I scoff.
He shakes his head. “Nah. Don’t have the patience for it, but I am lookin’ into security cameras and surveillance as a sideline. We were both always good with tech shit.”
I laugh. “You mean hackin’.”
He glances at me. “You still do that?”
I shrug. “Pays the bills.”
I had a friend from the wrong side of the tracks who taught me everything he knew about hacking. And then I got good at it. Really good.
It’s no surprise to hear about my brother’s plans. If I had the dough, I’d be doing that too. Unfortunately, the jobs I do don’t amount to much, but that’s largely because I’m pretty new to it. Long as I don’t get caught, life may start to look up a little in the not too distant future. If I can get outta dodge and find a better place to live.
He opens his mouth, then closes it again. I’m sure he was about to lecture me on coming to work with him, as that’s his usual repertoire after grilling me, but maybe today he thought better of it.
