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Isla was always the toughest, most confident girl I knew. Nothing ruffled her nerves. Her ire, sure, but not her nerves.
One time, we were maybe seventeen, we were hanging out with a bunch of the guys from the team and three of them broke into a fight. Isla, knowing her dad would kill them all, jumped in the middle of it and broke it up. A spitfire of five-foot-four and barely over a hundred pounds against three bulky hockey players, and she handled it like it was an ordinary occurrence that she dealt with daily. That’s how she handled everything, head-on and straight forward.
It’s how she dealt with me when I began getting closer to Trina, too. Isla routinely called me out on it, and I evaded the truth.
The woman standing in front of me now is not the same one I knew back then. Her spine is straight, chin lifted in defiance as her rose-colored lips pull taut. But the frayed edges show, the wear and tear of years that maybe haven’t been so kind to her… I see them. I feel the pressure of them weighing me down as if I’m moving through quicksand.
Wrapping her up in my arms, her back to my chest, I look to where our daughter stands surrounded by family.
“You hate me, and I’ve never been so mad at anyone in my life as I am with you. But that curly-haired beauty over there is more important than that,” I whisper into her ear through hair that smells like fresh rain and comfort. “We’re going to have some knockdown, drag out fights, Isla. I think that’s inevitable. But we’re going to get through this. For her and for our family.”
“I don’t trust you.”
“Fucking mutual, Isla. But we’ll change that.” If not fully, at least where Sadie is concerned, I’ll prove myself. I’m making the promise to the only woman I’ve ever given a shit about, but also to the people watching us right now. Our mothers, who look on with concern, and Coach who looks like he’s seconds away from marching over and keeping his promise of burying me six feet deep. “I’m not going to be a shitty father, Isla. I learned from the best man I know. Sadie comes first.”
Her chest hitches at my words, knowing I’m talking about her dad. I pull her tighter, and after a long sigh, she finally relaxes with a nod.
“No tears today. This is a big day for us all, let’s enjoy it. Set it all aside, we’ll start wrestling in the mud tomorrow.” With a final squeeze, I let her loose and lead her over to where everyone waits. If I can play nice, she fucking can, too. For a single day, anyway.
Vaughn and the few other guys that came in for this are grouped just past where our families stand. There is something important I need to do before I can go chat them up, though.
“Hi, Marney,” I greet Isla’s mother.
“Cillian.” She turns toward me, presenting her back to the rest of the group.
“It’s your turn to take a swing.”
“Well, I’m sure you remember that’s not quite my style,” she says pleasantly. It’s hard to read her right now. This could be feigned politeness for the crowd, or maybe she feels sorry for me. Marney is wholly unreadable with all her class and grace. “I was sorry to hear about your grandmother.”
“What,” Isla gasps.
“Thank you, Marney,” I say to the older woman before addressing the younger. “Gran died a little over a year ago.”
“I didn’t know,” she says, voice rattling over the words.
“I know, I couldn’t… It doesn’t matter. Not today, Isla.”
“Cill…”
“Not today,” I repeat before finding my new teammates. “Sadie, you want to meet some more of the Blades?”
“Yes!”
I introduce her as my daughter. Vaughn is the only one who shows any sign of surprise. Oliver Lehtinen, Axel Wallin, and Hugo Blom don’t show any indication that me having a daughter is a shocking surprise. Sadie shakes hands with them all, very officially, before she runs back over to her grandmothers.
Hugo is a seasoned goalie who has played in The Show, an old term for the NHL, for a few years longer than I have. He’s tall, but agile and lean. Outside of his pads, he’s an unassuming guy. Suit him up and he’s a dragon defending the treasure trove in his cave. The Blades were lucky to get him.
Axel and Oliver are both wingers. Axel has played pro for three years, he hasn’t always been given the advantage of ice time, but when he has the chance-he’s a sniper with his shot. Oliver is an all-around solid player. And a borderline goon, which will make him a fan favorite.
“She’s cute,” Oliver says with a nod who is giggling loudly with her mother. Pride like I’ve never known fills me up. Stupid really, I had such a small part in who or what she is as a tiny person. It’s more powerful than what I experienced being drafted or playing my first NHL game, though.
“The cutest,” I confirm.
“Her mom, too,” Axel adds. Every muscle in my body tenses. She’s not mine, but she sure as fuck isn’t for any of these guys either. “You two together?”
“Not anymore. But watch it, Coach will have choice words if you make a move on one of his daughters.”
“Speaking from experience?” Vaughn eyes me with that same knowing he had the other day. His brain is probably working overtime putting puzzle pieces together.
