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Sighing, I opened my wardrobe and quickly threw on a T-shirt, sweatpants, and a hoodie.
Grabbing a pair of socks from my chest of drawers, I sank down on my bed and pulled them on before toeing on a pair of runners.
All the while, Shannon stood silently by my door with her wet hair falling forward, concealing her face.
She seemed so lonely in this moment that it physically pained me to look at her. Because I knew I was responsible. And my heart was demanding I make it right.
I wanted to. I just didn’t know how without hurting both of us.
“Here,” I said, grabbing a jacket off the foot of my bed. “Put that on.”
Her nervous eyes darted to the jacket I was holding out for her and she immediately began to shake her head. “No, no, no,” she croaked out. “I’m o—”
“You’re okay. Yeah, I know,” I replied as I stood up and closed the space between us. “But it’s still lashing down with rain outside, and I’m not okay with you getting sick. Put it on.”
“Are you sure?” she asked, reaching out hesitantly.
Christ, this girl was killing me…
“Positive.” Handing her my jacket, I moved for the door, careful not to brush against her, knowing my poor dick couldn’t take the pressure.
I waited for her to slide the jacket on and then I walked out of my room, knowing she was with me, even though she trailed behind.
This felt so shitty—like the opposite of the right thing to do, which made zero sense because I was thinking with my brain right now, and not my dick.
“I need to get Ma’s keys,” I told her when we were standing in the downstairs foyer. “Gimme a sec, okay?”
“Um, yeah, okay,” Shannon replied as she slid her hands into my jacket that was swamping her. “I’ll wait here?”
Was she asking me?
It sounded like she was.
I didn’t know for sure because she wouldn’t look at me. I couldn’t gauge how she was feeling because the windows to her emotions, her eyes, were trained on her feet.
It fucking sucked, but I knew I needed to give her space right now.
Problem was, the closer to the front door we got, the more depressed I felt.
My dick was devastated. My chest was burning. My brain was doubtful.
I was completely fucked.
48You’re Okay
SHANNON
There were no words to explain the turbulence of emotions whishing through my body. Striving for control, I concentrated on breathing in slow, deep patterns.
I didn’t know what to do. Apologizing didn’t seem to cut it. Besides, I’d already done that.
I contemplated telling him that I had temporarily lost control of my senses back there, but I thought he might already know that.
Thoroughly mortified by my actions, I stared out the windscreen into the darkening sky and ignored the boy sitting in the driver’s seat beside me.
“Are we going to talk about it?” Johnny finally asked after several minutes of strained silence.
I shook my head, cheeks flaming with shame, and continued to stare out the window at nothing.
